


ethereal beauty

by kinounavailable



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Fluff and Angst, M/M, i feel like i didn't put as much effort into this as other people but y'know whatever, i was contemplating adding a good ending but decided suffering was the best answer, i'm so sorry i made wilbur a dick, it's 69 pages on docs which is funny, lmao some of the characters are just mentioned once but whatever, niki and ranboo are the only sane ones, no betas we die like men, this isn't as long as i would have hoped but ok
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-17
Updated: 2021-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-26 04:13:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 25,000
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30100116
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kinounavailable/pseuds/kinounavailable
Summary: ok so my school was doing a shakespeare unit and I did not like how the romance was written so I decided fuck this I'm gonna rewrite it myself AND make it a minecraft youtuber fanfiction to prove my point so here we arewelcome to romeo and juliet but it's 5undy
Relationships: (the fundywastaken is mentioned), Clay | Dream/Floris | Fundy, Floris | Fundy/5up
Comments: 6
Kudos: 38





	1. act 1

Act 1, Prologue  
In the beautiful city of Rozu, where our story takes place, a long-standing hatred between two families erupts into new violence, and citizens stain their hands with the blood of their fellow citizens. Two children of these enemy families become lovers and commit suicide. Their unfortunate deaths put an end to their parents' feud. 

Today, we'll be telling the tragic story of their doomed love and their parents' anger, which nothing but the children's deaths could stop. Enjoy :)

Act 1, Scene 1

Enter PONK and PURPLED.  
“Ponk, I swear to god. We can’t let them humiliate us. I’m not taking their garbage.”

Ponk and Purpled entered, chatting.

“No, because then we’d be garbagemen,” Ponk teasingly looked at Purpled. 

Purpled grumbled and rubbed his eyes. His weighted sword gleamed at his side and a wooden shield was attached to his left arm.

“Idiot, I mean that if they make us angry, we pull our swords on them,” Purpled pulled his sword out and held it in front of him, pretending to fight an invisible opponent.

“I think you should focus on pulling yourself out of trouble, Purpled.”

Purpled elbowed Ponk’s side, a small laugh escaping his mouth.

“I hit hard when I’m angry.”

“But it’s hard to make you angry,” Ponk laughed.

Purpled sighed, shoving his broadsword back in its sheath. He turned to face Ponk and hit him with his shield.

“Those guys from the Cogchamps make me angry.”

“Angry enough to run away. You won’t stand and fight,” Ponk hit him back with his shield.

“Those bitches make me angry enough to take a stand. If I see one of them on the streets, I’ll go to the wall and fucking dropkick them into the sewers.”

“Well, that means you’re the weak one. Only the weaklings get pushed up against the wall,” Ponk placed his hand on his chin, shifting his colored mask.

Purpled paused, trying to think of a counter. But he couldn’t.

“True," Purpled thoughtfully said.

“This fight is between our masters. We are just the men who work for them,” Ponk pointed out.

“That’s-” Purpled was cut off.

Two servants of the Cogchamps enter.

Ponk slapped his hand over Purpled’s mouth and pulled out his sword.

“Get your sword! They’re from the Cogchamps.”

“I got it. Fight, I’ll back you up,” Purpled pulled his sword out of his sheath and held his shield up. 

Ponk gave him a confused stare.

“How are you gonna back me up, by turning around and running away?”

“Don’t worry about me.”

“No really. I am worried about you!”

Purpled hit Ponk with his shield again, smiling. Ponk sighed, knowing that he had some stupid plan.

“Let’s not break the law by starting a fight. Let them start something.”

“Uh- let’s frown at them as they walk by. They can react however they want-” Purpled slapped his hand over Ponk’s mouth and smirked at him.

“You mean however they dare.”

Purpled giggled, and Ponk sighed. Purpled is a dumbass. He mouthed ‘fuck you’ to the other sevants, and Ponk hit him with his shield.

“You are so stupid, I hope you realise that.”

Purpled laughed as the other servants walked over.

“Why did you do that?” The servant asked.

“Do what? I didn’t do anything,” Purpled said nonchalantly.

Ponk desperately turned to Purpled, grasping his shoulder. He gave the other a pleading look.

“Are you trying to start a fight?”

“Me? Start a fight? Nah,” Ponk sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. The Cogchamps servants stood awkwardly in front of them. Purpled smugly looked back to the others. Ponk turned back to the other servants and gave them a serious look.

“Are you trying to start a fight?”

“No sir,” The others quickly spoke up.

Purpled smiled and pointed his sword to the Cogchamps servants.

“If you want to fight, fight me. My employer is as good as yours,” Purpled smugly said. Ponk hit him on the side with his shield and Purpled hit him back in retaliation.

“But he’s not better than mine.”

“We’ll see." 

RANBOO enters.

Ponk looked over at Purpled and whispered to him again.

“That’s one of my employer’s relatives, Ranboo. Say something good to the servants,” Ponk leaned back and put his sword back in its sheath. 

“I’m sure you’re having a fine day, sir,” Purpled had a slightly mocking tone.

“You’re a liar,” The servant glared at Purpled.

Ponk looked over at Ranboo, who had just entered and was watching from the side. He cocked his head slightly and merely stared at the servant.

“Get your swords. Ponk, back me up." 

Purpled paid no mind to the man standing to the side and instead, pointed his sword at the other servant’s neck. They immediately engaged, slashing at each other with trained accuracy. Ranboo immediately ran in and stepped in between the two, pulling out his sword.

“Break it up, guys. Put your swords away. Fighting like this won’t do anything for you.”

Enter TOMMYINNIT.

“What? You’ve pulled out your sword to fight with these servants? Turn around, Ranboo, and look me in the eyes while I kill you,” Tommy was almost smug, he tried to seem more superior.

“I’m only trying to keep the peace. Either put away your sword or use it to help me stop this fight,” Ranboo remained collected.

“What the hell? You take out your sword and then talk about peace? That’s stupid. You aren’t doing anything for this.”

Tommy lashed at Ranboo, swiping his sword at the other’s head. Ranboo stepped back, his movements being much more graceful than Tommy’s. He aimed for Tommy’s right arm, keeping his body language closed and defensive. Several citizens seemed to congregate around the fight, chanting and urging the violence.

“Use your clubs and spears! Hit them! Beat them down! Down with the Dream SMP! Down with the Cogchamps!”

WILBUR enters, together with his wife, LADY SALLY.

“What’s with the commotion? Give me my sword, this needs to stop.”

Sally looked at Wilbur, concern plastered all over her face.

“Why are you asking for a sword, you can barely fight,” Her voice was regal, not suited for war at all.

DISGUISED TOAST enters with his sword drawn, together with his wife, LADY TOAST.

“Hand me my sword, Toast is here, and he’s waving his sword around just to make me mad,” Wilbur aggressively reached for his sword, Sally holding it away.

“Wilbur.” 

Toast’s wife held him back as he attempted to charge at Wilbur. He turned to his wife.

“Don’t stop me! Let me go.”

“You’re not taking one step towards an enemy,” His wife’s voice was firm and Toast sighed.

PRINCE GEORGENOTFOUND enters with his escort.

“You rebels! Enemies of the peace! Men who turn weapons against their neighbors-” The fighting continued despite George’s words. He continued.

“You idiots, who satisfy your anger with fountains of each others’ blood! I’ll have you tortured if you don’t put down your swords and listen to your prince.”

Toast, Wilbur, and their followers threw down their weapons, metal clattering to the stone floors. George sighed and continued now that he had everyone’s attention.

“Three times now riots have broken out in this city, all because of a casual word from you, Cogchamp and Dream SMPers. Three times the peace has been disturbed in our streets, and Rozu’s old citizens have had to pick up their rusty spears to stop you." 

George was growing angrier.

“If you ever cause a disturbance on our streets again, you’ll pay for it with your lives. Everyone else, go away for now." 

The prince turned to Toast.

“You. Come with me.”

He then turned to Wilbur.

“Wilbur, this afternoon come to the courthouse, where I deliver judgments, and I’ll tell you what else I want from you.”

He finally turned to the gathering crowd.

“As for the rest of you, I’ll say this once more. Go away or be put to death.”

All the bystanders hurriedly fled the scene, fearful for what their leader could do. The only ones who remained were Toast, Lady Toast, and Ranboo. George sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, turning to the three.

“Who started this fight again? Ranboo, were you here when it started?”

Ranboo flinched as George suddenly asked him a question. He nervously rubbed the back of his neck.

“Uh, your servants were fighting the enemy servants before I got here. I drew my sword to break up the fight. Then, Tommyinnit showed up with his sword at the ready and taunted me. As we were fighting, more and more people came to join before the Prince came and broke everything up.”

Lady Toast perked up and tapped her husband’s arm.

“Oh, where’s 5up? Have you seen him today? I’m happy he wasn’t here for the fight.”

Ranboo looked up at Lady Toast with an apologetic expression.

“Ma’am, I had a lot on my mind an hour before dawn this morning, so I went for a walk. Under the sycamore grove that grows on the west side of the city, I saw your son going for a walk. I tried to talk to him, but he probably saw me heading over and hid in the woods. I figured he must have wanted to be alone and was tired of company, so I was perfectly happy with leaving him alone and keeping to myself.”

Toast looked up, thinking to himself. He carefully formulated a sentence to describe what he was trying to say without sounding uncaring. 

“I’ve uh- seen him there a lot, crying tears that add drops to the morning dew and making a cloudy day cloudier with his sighs. But as soon as the sun rises, my son comes home to escape the light.”

Ranboo and Lady Toast beckoned him to continue.

“He locks himself alone in his room, shuts his windows, and makes an artificial light. This mood of his is going to bring bad news unless someone smart can fix what’s bothering him.”

“Sir, do you know why he does it?” Ranboo spoke up, attempting to make sense of the situation.

“No clue, and he won’t tell me anything.”

Ranboo, adopting the role of a detective, decided to continue asking questions to Toast.

“Well, have you done everything you can to make him tell you the reason?”

Toast paused before answering. 

“I’ve tried, and I’ve gotten many of our friends to try to make him talk, but he keeps his thoughts to himself. He doesn’t want any friends apart from himself, and I don’t know whether he’s a good friend to himself. He certainly keeps his secrets. He’s like a flower but that won’t open up to the world because it’s been poisoned by parasites from inside. If we could find out why he’s sad, we would be eager to help just as much as we are to find out the reason,” Toast finished. 

5up enters.

“Look- here he comes. If you don’t mind, please leave. If he doesn’t tell me what’s wrong, he won’t tell anyone,” Ranboo whispered, watching Toast and Lady Toast leave.

DISGUISED TOAST and LADY TOAST exit.

“Mornin, Five.”

5up rubbed his eyes, looking down at the floor.

“Is it that early in the day?”

“It’s nine o’clock.”

Five sighed and clapped his hands.

“Woah- time goes by slower than I noticed. Was that my father who hurried out?” Five looked to the side where Toast and Lady Toast left.

“It was. What’s making you so sad?” Ranboo placed his hand on 5up’s shoulder.

5up sighed again.

“I don’t have the thing that makes time fly.”

Ranboo knowingly smiled.

“You’re in love?”

“Out,” Five looked down.

“Out of love?” Ranboo was confused.

“I love someone. She doesn’t love me.”

Of course, Ranboo had little to no experience with love. He had never really felt like he specifically loved anyone, but he would always try his best to bring a smile to Five’s face.

“It’s sad. Love looks like a nice thing, but it’s very rough when you experience it,” Ranboo probably made it worse. Poor guy.

“What’s sad is that love is supposed to be blind, but it can still make you do whatever it wants. So, where should we eat-” 

5up looked down, noticing the blood streaks on the floor. 

“Oh! What fight happened here? This fight has a lot to do with hatred, but it has more to do with love. Love that comes from nothing! Sad happiness, serious foolishness. Beautiful things muddled together into an ugly mess! Love is heavy and light, bright and dark. Hot and cold, sick and healthy, asleep and awake- it’s everything except what it is. This is the love I feel, though no one loves me back-” 

5up heard a tiny noise in front of him.

“Are you laughing?”

Ranboo sniffed.

“No, I’m crying.”

“Why are you crying, Ran?”

Ranboo rubbed his eyes, trying to get rid of his tears.

“I’m crying because of how sad you are. It’s contagious.”

“Yes, that’s what love does. It sits heavy in my chest, and you want to add your sadness to mine so there’s even more. I have too much sadness already, and now you’re going to make me sadder by feeling sorry for you. Here’s what love is: a smoke made out of lovers’ sighs. When the smoke clears, love is a fire burning in your lover’s eyes. If you frustrate love, you get an ocean made out of lovers’ tears. What else is love? It’s a wise form of madness. I’m going now, Ranboo.”

Ranboo grabbed 5up’s arm.

“Wait! I’ll come with you. Don’t leave.”

5up grabbed his hand and softly pried it off his arm.

“I’m not myself. I’m not really here. This isn’t 5up- he’s somewhere else.”

“Who do you love?”

5up seemed surprised by his question.

“What, do I have to tell you?”

“Please?”

“If you tell a sick man he ‘has’ to make his will- it would just make it worse. Seriously Ran, I love a woman.”

“I guess that when I guessed you were in love,” Ranboo was bad at this.

“Then you were on target. The woman I love is beautiful,” 5up reminisced.

“A beautiful target is the one that gets hit the fastest,” He should just stop talking at this point.

“Well, you’re not on target there. She doesn’t want to be hit. She’s clever, shielded by the armor of chastity. She can’t be touched by the weak and childish arrows of love. She won’t listen to the words of love or let you look at her with loving eyes. She’s rich in beauty, but she’s also poor because when she dies her beauty will be destroyed with her.”

“Take my advice. Don’t think about her.”

5up sighed and slapped his hands over his eyes.

“How do I not think?”

Ranboo racked his brain, trying to come up with a reasonable answer without sounding like a dick.

“Let your eyes wander freely. Look at other girls,” That was a good start.

“That will only make me think more about how beautiful she is. Beautiful women like to wear masks over their faces- those masks only make us think about how beautiful they are underneath. If someone goes blind, they can’t forget the eyesight they lost. Show me a really beautiful girl. Her beauty is like a note telling me where I can see someone even more beautiful. You can’t teach me how to forget,” Nevermind.

I’ll show you how to forget, or else I’ll die owing you that lesson,” Ranboo finally told him before pulling his arm to the exit.  
They exit.

Act 1, Scene 2

WILBUR enters with Count DREAM, followed by JACK MANIFOLD, a servant.

“-but Toast has sworn an oath just like I have, he’s under the same penalty. I don’t think it’ll be hard for men as old as we are to keep the peace,” Wilbur seemed to be continuing a previous conversation.

“You both have honorable reputations, and it’s too bad you’ve been enemies for so long. But have you considered my request?”

Wilbur groaned with his face in his hands.

“I can only repeat what I’ve said before, Dream. My son is still very young. Let’s wait two more summers before we start thinking about when he’s ready to get married.”

“Men younger than him often marry and become happy fathers, this is not much different, sir.”

“Sir Dream, he will grow up too soon. But go ahead and try. Make him love you. My permission is only part of his decision. If he agreed to marry you, my blessing and fair words will confirm his choice. Tonight, I’m holding a feast. I’ve invited many of my closest friends, and I would like to add you to the guest list. At my humble house tonight, expect to see dazzling stars that walk on the ground and light the sky from below.”

Wilbur dramatically described his party as Dream intently listened. He seemed to be very excited about what was going to happen tonight.

“You’ll be delighted with women as fresh as spring flowers. Look at anyone you like, and choose whatever woman is best for you. Once you see a lot of them, you might not think my son’s the best anymore. Come along with me.”

Wilbur looked over at Manifold who was patiently awaiting an order.

“Manifold, go walk around Rozu. Find the people on this list and tell them they’re welcome at my house tonight,” Wilbur handed Jack a paper with a list of names before leaving the room, Dream following close behind him.

WILBUR and DREAM exit.

Jack looked confusedly at the names on the sheet. He tried to scan them, but the neat symbols appeared messy and confusing to him.

“Find the names on the list? I shouldn’t be drabbling in someone’s work, but I’ve been told to find the names on the list. And I can’t read! I’ll never find them on my own, I need to find someone who knows how to read to help me.”

RANBOO and 5UP enter.

“Ah! There’s someone who could help me.”

Ranboo and 5up stepped in, talking and gesturing to each other. Well, Ranboo was talking and gesturing. 5up was just listening.

“Come on, Five. You can put out one fire by starting another. A new pain will make the one you already have seem less. New grief will put the old one out of your mind. Make yourself lovesick by gazing at some new girl, and your old lovesickness will be cured," Ranboo, just stop talking. He tries so hard. Poor boy.

“The plantain leaf is excellent for that.”

Ranboo seemed confused, not knowing why 5up was referencing a healing plant.

“For what, Five?”

“For when you cut your shin,” 5up said calmly.

“What? Are you crazy?” Ranboo perked up.

“I’m not crazy, but I’m tied up tighter than a mental patient in a straitjacket. I’m locked up in a prison and deprived of food. I’m whipped and tortured-” 5up looked to the side, seeing Jack Manifold standing patiently to the side.

“Ah- good evening, Manifold.”

“Good evening. Excuse me, sir, do you know how to read?” Manifold asked, showing him the papers.

“I can read my own fortune in my misery." 

“Perhaps you’ve learned from life and not books. But can you read anything you see?”

“Yes, if I know the language and the letters.”

Manifold looked at the scribbles on the paper, then back at 5up. 

“I see, well that’s an honest answer. Have a good day, sir,” Manifold assumed 5up couldn’t read and began to leave. 5up grabbed his arm and pulled him back, grabbing the paper.

"Stay, I know how to read. I'll take this-" 5up took the paper and scanned the delicately written symbols, reading out the words they contained.

"Okay. Duke Stevensuptic, Count Dumbdog, Lady Hafu, Duke Jacksepticeye, Lady Rosaline, Sapnap and his brother Quackity, Duke Technoblade, his brother Tommyinnit and their father Phil, and all of their families," 5up looked up at Manifold.

"This is a lovely group of people. Where are they coming?"

"To supper, at our house."

"Who's house?" 5up asked.

"My master's house," Manifold said.

5up sighed and passed the paper back to Manifold.

"Of course, I should have asked you earlier."

"At least I've told you now. My master is the great and rich Wilbur Soot. If you don't belong to the Cogchamps house, please come and enjoy a glass of wine. Have a good day, sir!"

Manifold promptly bowed and exited. 

JACK MANIFOLD exits.

Ranboo looked at 5up with a grim expression.

"Rosaline will be at the party, along with all the beautiful women in Rozu. Go there and compare her to some other girls that I show you. Soon, you'll forget about her," For once, this isn't a bad idea. Good job Ranboo. 

Ranboo smiled to himself and turned to 5up. He had an angry expression.

"If my eyes ever lie to me like that, let my tears burn my soul for being such obvious liars! A woman more beautiful than the one I love? The sun itself has never seen anyone as beautiful since the world began." 

Ranboo noticed how sophisticated 5up talked when he was angry, so he decided to attempt to convince 5up.

"Come on, you decided that she was beautiful because nobody was around. Let yourself compare her to others, then she won't seem like the best anymore."

5up thought on this for a moment, weighing his options before deciding that Ranboo would force him to either way. 

"I'll go with you. But not because I think you'll succeed, but because the person I love will be there."

They exit.

Act 1, Scene 3

Lady SALLY and NURSE NIHACHU enter.

"Nihachu, where is my son? Tell him to come here."

Nihachu looked to the door, waiting for signs of it opening. 

"I swear, ma'am, I've already told him to come. Come on, where is he!"

After a few moments of waiting the door clicked open.

FUNDY enters.

Fundy groaned and pushed the door behind him, closing it. His white tunic was crumpled and he was barefoot. His messy orange hair was tied into a tiny ponytail behind him.

"What is it? Who's calling me?"

Niki fondly smiled at Fundy.

"Your mother, sir."

"Mother, I'm here. What do you want?"

Sally glanced at Fundy and sighed, giving him a tiny smile. 

"I'll tell you what's the matter- Nurse, I would have asked you to leave if you didn't nurse Fundy. You know all of our secrets, therefore, you can stay. You know how young my son is."

"Yes, I know his age down to the hour."

"He's not even 21."

"I'd bet my right arm that he's not 21. How long until October 10?"

"Two weeks and a few odd days," Sally recalled.

"Whether it's even or odd, on the night of October 10, Fundy will turn 21. He and Alyssa, bless her soul, were born on the same day. Well, Alyssa is sadly dead. She was too good for me. But like I said, he will be 21 soon. Yes, he will. Indeed. I remember it well."

Nihachu paused for breath and continued.

"It's been eighteen years since the earthquake. We were sitting under the wall of the dove house, beneath the sun. You and your husband were in the Rapids. Do I have some memory! But like I said, the pretty little Fundy started quarreling with me, grabbing at my hair. The beautiful dove house began to shake from the earthquake. There was no need to tell me to get out of there.”

Sally and Fundy were surprised at Nihachu’s memory, watching as she recalled the exact events of the earthquake.

“That was a whole eighteen years ago. By then, he could stand up by himself. He would run and waddle around the halls. I remember because he had cut his forehead the day before. My late wife, bless her soul, she was a happy woman- picked up Fundy.”

“‘Did you fall on your face? When you get smarter, you won’t just be falling on your face, will you Funster?’ And I swear, he stopped crying and said ‘yes.’”

Nihachu giggled softly as she continued telling her story.

“I bet if I live a thousand years, I’ll never forget it.”

Sally groaned and slapped her hand over her face.

“Enough of this. Please be quiet, we’re off-topic,” Sally remained stoic, while Nihachu was on the verge of tears from laughing and Fundy was awkwardly in between it all.

“Yes ma’am, but I can’t help but laugh at the thought. He stopped crying and said yes! He had such a big cut and he was crying so bitterly. ‘Did you fall on your face?’ She said.”

Fundy rubbed his eyes.

“You stop too, Niki.”

“Hey, I’m done talking. You were the best baby I took care of. If I live to see you get married, all my dreams will come true.”

Sally clapped her hands, smiling.

“Well, marriage is exactly what we have to discuss! Fundy, what’s your opinion on marriage?”

“It is an honor that barely crosses my mind.”

“Honor? If I wasn’t your only nurse, I’d say you were born with the wisdom of a king.”

Lady Sally placed her hand on Fundy’s shoulder, fondly smiling.

“Well, you’ll have to start thinking about marriage now. I understand that you wish to marry a man instead of a woman, but you are still very behind on the other girls and boys of Rozu. Some of them from noble families have already become fathers. When I was your age, I was already a mother. I will say this quickly then: the valiant Dream wants you as his groom.”

“And what a man! He’s great for you! He’s perfect as if he were sculpted from clay,” Niki poked in.

“Summertime in Rozu has no flower finer than him,” Sally replied.

“No, he’s a fine flower indeed.”

Sally happily turned to Fundy and smiled, giving him an excited look.

“So? What do you say? Can you love this gentleman? Tonight, you’ll see him at our feast. Study his every feature, work out how they make him handsome. He’s single, and he lacks only a bride to make him perfect and complete, but a groom will do just fine.”

Fundy was slightly discouraged but waited for his mother to finish.

“It’s wrong for a handsome man like you to hide from a man like him. Many people think he’s handsome, and if you marry him, you will be just as admired. You would share all he possesses, and by having him, you would lose nothing.”

“Lose nothing? You’d get bigger. Our reputation will grow ten-fold,” Niki said.

Sally nodded at Nihachu and gave Fundy a questioning look.

“Give us a quick answer. Can you accept Dream’s love?”

Fundy paused, looking at the ground. He carefully weighed his options. If he said yes, then it would help his family’s reputation. If he said no, he could search for someone he had a real connection with.

“I’ll see if I like him. But, I won’t let myself fall for him any more than your permission allows.”

JACK MANIFOLD enters.

Manifold quickly ran into the room, a hurried expression on his face.

“Madam, the guests are here, dinner is served. The guests are calling for you, people have asked for Fundy. People are cursing the nurse in the pantry. Everything’s out of control, we must serve the guests. Please, follow me.”

Sally groaned and stepped towards the exit.

“We’ll follow you. Fundy, Count Dream is waiting for you.”

Niki fondly pushed Fundy towards the door, smiling. She gestured to the exit, where soft music was singing through the room. 

“Go on, Fundy. Look for the man who’ll give you happy nights at the end of happy days.”

They all exit.

Act 1, Scene 4

5UP, SAPNAP, and RANBOO enter dressed with masks, along with five or six other maskers.

“What’s our excuse for being here? Or should we just go in randomly?” 5up looked to the other two. 

Ranboo seemed visibly nervous, and Sapnap was very excited. Sapnap’s eyes seemed to dance with the yellows and oranges surrounding them, and Ranboo’s eyes were dark and cautious, though gleaming brightly in the night.

“Let’s not give a long lengthy explanation. We’re not going to introduce our dance by being untruthful. We’ll let them judge us however they please. We’ll give them a dance and then hit the road,” Sapnap said, reaching for a small lantern on a counter. 

“Give me a lantern. I don’t want to dance. So let me carry the light.”

“No man, you have to dance,” Ranboo grabbed his arm.

“Nah. Believe me, I’m uh- not wearing the right shoes. Yeah. I can barely move,” 5up desperately tried to come up with an excuse, but his nervousness clouded his regular clear and quick mind.

“But you’re a lover. You can soar higher than the clouds,” Sapnap countered.

“I sink under the heavy weight of love.”

“If you sink, you’re dragging love down. It’s not right to drag down something as tender as love.”

Ranboo awkwardly stood between the quarreling friends.

“Is love really tender? It’s too rough, too rude, too sharp, it pricks like a thorn,” 5up said, reaching for Sapnap’s lantern before having his hand batted away.

“If love plays rough with you, you play rough with love,” Sapnap said, “If you prick love when it pricks you, you’ll beat it down. Now let's get some masks. Who cares if someone sees my flaws? Let this mask cover me.”

Ranboo reached for three masks, which he passed to the other three. Ranboo wore a black and white split mask, with red accents on the white side and green accents on the black side. Sapnap wore a fiery red mask with beautiful swirls of orange and yellow. Finally, 5up took a light pink mask with white and red accents and green, leaf-shaped patterns adorning its surface.

“Come on, let’s just go in,” Ranboo pushed both of them towards the entrance.

“I’ll take the lantern. Let the playful people dance. There’s a saying: you can’t lose if you don’t play the game. I’ll hold the lantern and watch you guys. It looks really fun, but I’ll sit this one out.”

“Stop being so cautious! You’re being such a stick in the mud. We can pull you out of the mud, I mean out of love when you’re stuck up to your ears. Come on, we’re wasting daylight!” Sapnap exclaimed.

“It’s night, idiot,” 5up grabbed the lantern from Sapnap.

“I mean we’re wasting lantern light by delaying. Use your perfect common sense to figure out what I mean instead of trying to be clever or trusting your five senses.”

“I mean well by going to this masquerade, but it’s not smart to go.”

“Why?” Ranboo poked in.

“I had a dream last night,” 5up replied.

“Me too!” Sapnap said.

“Well, what was your dream?”

“That you’re full of shit," Sapnap retorted.

“Hey uh- let’s not escalate things at a public event. We’re with strangers-” Ranboo said desperately.

“They dream of the truth," 5up ignored Ranboo and continued. 

“Yeah, but-”

“Enough! Sapnap, shut up. We’re getting nowhere.”

“True, but I’m talking about dreams, which are the product of your brain’s unconscious. Dreams are nothing but imagination, as thin as air, less predictable than the wind, which sometimes blows to the frozen north and then gets angry and blows south.”

“Uh- the wind you’re talking about is blowing us off course. Dinner is already over, and we’re going to get there late," Ranboo pushed them closer to the door.

“I have a bad feeling about this party. Something that might end very badly. But fuck that shit, I go where I want!”

The trio stepped towards the door, entering the party. Music surrounded them and shining lights made the walls gleam. 

This was going to be a long night.

They exit.

Act 1, Scene 5

JACK MANIFOLD and other FOOLISH GAMERS come forward with napkins.

“Where’s Antfrost? Why isn’t he helping us clear the table? He should be here,” Manifold turned to Foolish. 

‘When one or two people are working, the others will never join to help," Foolish replied. 

“Take away the stools, sideboards, and plates. Save me a marzipan. Have the porter let in Duke Technoblade and Philza. Antfrost!”

“Yes, sir," Antfrost entered and replied.

“They’re looking for you in the great chamber," Manifold pointed to the hall.

“We can’t be in two places at once, sir. Be quick.”

JACK MANIFOLD, ANTFROST, and FOOLISH GAMERS exit.

WILBUR enters with Duke TECHNOBLADE, LADY SALLY, TOMMY, FUNDY, and other members of the house. They meet 5UP, RANBOO, SAPNAP, and other guests and MASKERS.

Wilbur pointed to the giant ballroom. Dimly lit lanterns decorated the room as soft music wafted through the hall. 

“Welcome, gentlemen. There was a time when I could wear a mask over my eyes and charm a lady by whispering in her ear. That time is gone, my friends. You are welcome, gentlemen. Musicians, begin the song. Make room in the hall,” Wilbur looked to Antfrost and Foolish, “More light in the lanterns, flip the tables and move them out of the way.”

As Wilbur barked orders at the serving-men, 5up nervously moved to the side. Surprisingly, nobody noticed. Wilbur turned to Duke Technoblade, smiling.

“Techno! Sit down, doesn’t this unexpected fun feel good? No, sit down dear cousin, you and I are too old to dance. How long has it been since we last wore masks at a party like this?”

Techno chuckled and looked at Wilbur.

“It must have been 30 years.”

Wilbur scoffed.

“What? It’s not that long. It’s been since Phil’s wedding. Let the years fly by as fast as they like, it’s only been like 7 years since we wore masquerade masks.”

“It’s definitely longer.”

“Are you really gonna tell me that? His son was a minor only two years ago.”

“He had his son way after his wedding, Wil.”

While Techno and Wilbur were bantering, 5up scanned the room from the side. He analyzed each woman there, carefully studying their features for Ranboo’s sake. However, someone caught his eye. It wasn’t Rosaline, let alone a woman. 

His orange hair gleamed in the dark lantern light, carefully tied into a small braid behind him. A tiny silver strand ran through the orange hair, parted to the side, and tucked behind his ear. His blue eyes shone like diamonds and his facial features were highlighted in the soft light. His eyelashes softly fluttered as he also looked throughout the room. His cheeks were perfectly sculpted and his lips looked soft. A light pink dusted his cheeks as 5up had a damning realization.

Shit.

5up turned to a serving-man, who he recognized was named Antfrost.

“Who is the man there? With the knight?”

“I uh, don’t know sir," The server replied.

“Oh, he shows the torches how to burn bright! He stands out against the darkness like the moon against the night sky! His beauty is too good for this world, he’s too beautiful to die. He outshines the other men and women like a dove in a flock of crows. Did my heart love anyone before this moment? My eyes were liars because I’d never seen pure beauty before tonight," Antfrost knowingly looked up at 5up, but let him continue his slightly sophisticated rant.

To the other side of the room, Tommy was loosely listening to the conversation. Although he didn’t quite pick up on what 5up was saying, he heard the man’s accent just fine. He turned to his page.

“I can tell that he’s a Cogchamp by his voice. Pass me my sword, he dares come here with his face covered by a mask, like the fucking coward he is. Does he want to scorn our party? By honor, I’m gonna kill the dipshit," He angrily said.

Wilbur walked over and looked to Tommy, recognizing the anger in his voice.

“What’s wrong? Why are you so angry?”

“This guy’s from Cogchamps- our enemy. He’s a dickhead who’s come here to make a mockery of our party.”

Wilbur looked over to see 5up staring at someone, though he couldn’t quite see the person.

“Is that young 5up?”

Tommy scoffed.

“The villain 5up.”

Wilbur laughed and placed his hand on Tommy’s shoulder, which was nearly shaking with rage.

“Calm down, Tommy. Leave him alone. He’s a dignified man with a reputation throughout Rozu as a smart and well-behaved man. I wouldn’t insult him in my house for all the money in the world. So just ignore him and calm down. If you respect me, you’ll look nice and stop frowning.”

“If that’s the right way to act when a villain like him shows up, then I won’t take his shit.”

“You will tolerate him. I say you will. I’m the boss here. God help me. You’ll start a riot among my guests! There will be chaos! It will be your fault!” Wilbur retorted, pointing to the silent and watching guests.

“But we’re being disrespected.”

Wilbur reduced his voice to a whisper.

“You’re an insolent fucking child. Is that how it is? Your stupidity will come to bite you in the back. You have to contradict me, do you?”

Wilbur turned back to the guests and raised his voice.

“Well done, my dear guests! Keep having fun, dear friends!”

“You’re a little brat," Wilbur turned back to Tommy and whispered again.

“More light, dear servers!” He exclaimed.

The music restarted and the guests went back to slow dancing in the center of the ballroom. The ambiance was reset and everything seemingly went back to normal.

“I am feeling so much forced patience and pure rage that my body is fucking trembling. I’ll leave now, but 5up’s gonna pull some shit and you’re gonna be apologizing to me. 

Tommy angrily left Wilbur, walking out of the grand doorway and into the darkening night.

TOMMY exits.

5up looked away from the dissolving feud between Wilbur and Tommy, searching for whoever the man was that stole his heart. Was this true love? Was loving a man even accepted, normal? Were his feelings for Rosaline a lie? Those were questions he could never answer. But what he did know was that this man was the most beautiful man in the world. 

He wasn’t supposed to feel like this towards a man, right? He was a member of the Cogchamps family, he was supposed to marry a woman and continue the Cogchamp bloodline. This wasn’t right, he would be shamed for eternity. But this man was perfect. 5up imagined what it would be like to hold his hand and kiss the back of it, to hold him close and run his calloused fingers through the beautiful orange hair, to softly press his lips against the other’s. 

5up looked to the server with stern eyes.

“Nobody hears of this. This conversation never happened," Antfrost gave him an amused expression and nodded.

“Of course, sir.”

5up walked across the room to where the orange-haired man was standing alone. The other man seemed to freeze when he saw 5up, his soft pink cheeks shifting to a dark red. His diamond blue eyes glittered as he stared straight at 5up.

“Uh- hi. I’m uh- I’m Fundy," Fundy managed to stutter, completely mesmerized by the man in front of him. His chocolate brown eyes swirled in the soft lantern light and his black hair shone in the soft light. His mask perfectly fit his face and his defined facial features were beautiful in every way, shape, and form. 

“May I have this dance, Fundy?”

The music was a soft, smooth tune. Fundy nodded, thoughts racing. 5up led him onto the floor. People surrounded them, but Fundy could only focus on the man in front of him. 

5up took Fundy’s hand, placing his other hand on his hip. Fundy stuttered, not able to recall what to do. 5up smiled, taking his hand and placing it on his own shoulder, taking the other one and holding it to the side.

They fell into the tune of the music, staring into each other’s eyes as the soft song and the people surrounding them hung in the air. They spun and stepped together, in perfect sync. 

Fundy was carried away by 5up’s swirling black eyes, almost shifting into a soft gold in the lantern light. He had a small, loving smile on his face. Fundy wanted to feel how warm his face was getting, but didn’t want to lose the feeling of 5up’s hands in his.

5up was in love with Fundy. It was simple, recognisable from a mile away. Fundy’s ocean blue eyes were the colour of his unrequited tears, and his beautiful face was neatly and carefully sculpted. Everything about Fundy was beautiful, and the soft ambiance of the room was ethereal. 

5up got impulsive. He twirled Fundy out of the group, taking him to the side. Fundy’s eyes were glazed over, like he couldn’t comprehend the situation. He tugged Fundy into a hallway, their eyes still glued to each other. 5up managed to peel his eyes away, focusing on not bumping them into anything.

Soon, Fundy’s thoughts stopped racing and his brain finally registered what was happening at the moment. As 5up led him out of the ballroom and through the halls, Fundy truly got to admire his features. He walked with such precision and accuracy, and he barely moved up and down as he smoothly led Fundy through the halls.

“Uh- What’s your name?” Fundy stammered.

5up smiled.

“5up.”

Soon, they reached a discreetly placed balcony which 5up led him onto. He placed his hands on the brass railing and beckoned Fundy to stand next to him. 

Fundy shakily smiled and stepped on, placing his own hands on the balcony. He stared at 5up, unable to peel his eyes away as the other man stared into the distance, the moon shining in his coffee brown eyes. He was infatuated.

“Uh- what brings you to this party?” 5up nervously asked, desperately praying that he didn’t mess up his shot.

Fundy found comfort in knowing that the other was nervous as well.

“I uh- my mother wanted me to meet Count Dream. She wants me to marry him.”

5up was surprised, to say the least. He had no idea that men could feel this way with other men, or if it was socially accepted at all. Considering he had no idea about Fundy, he assumed it was quite a rare thing and that his preference was very ‘sheltered’, hidden from society.

“Are you feeling what I feel right now?” 5up asked, “Is this what love is? The feeling of suffocation, when you can’t look away? When you’re almost frozen in time, like the ice that coats Rozu in the winters?”

Fundy reached his hand over and placed it on top of 5up’s.

“I think so," Fundy smiled.

That left 5up a flustered mess. The tables had turned, and now 5up’s cheeks were a bright pink and he pulled his hand away to place his palms on his cheeks, feeling the radiating warmth.

Fundy reached his hand up and placed it on 5up’s hand.

“You’re beautiful.”

5up made a quick decision, deciding he didn’t want to wait any longer.

He extended his hand and grabbed Fundy’s fox themed mask, pulling it off and pressing his lips to Fundy’s.

Fireworks and explosives couldn’t get close to what Fundy was feeling. His heart was exploding and his brain was running at more than a mile a minute. Fundy reached his arms up, wrapping them around 5up’s neck and smiling into the kiss. 

Fundy’s lips felt just as soft as 5up imagined, and his heart was lit on fire. 5up had always believed that love was a rough and spiky feeling, but now he understood. He understood what true love felt like. He ran his hand down Fundy’s back before resting it perfectly in the curve of his lower back. He pressed his lips closer, savoring the warm and addictive feeling. They both perfectly fit together, like pieces in a puzzle.

Soon, Fundy pulled away, taking a deep breath. He looked into 5up’s beautiful eyes and smiled, taking his mask and pulling it off. 

“You’re beautiful too," 5up shakily said, his brain barely comprehending what he was doing. 5up didn’t just like him as he did with Rosaline, he loved him. This isn’t normal. But it felt so right.

Fundy reached up and pressed his lips to 5up’s again. It felt just as magical as the last. He felt like he was floating, higher than the clouds and the glowing moon. The soft echo of music surrounded them and the moon’s soft gleam made them feel like they were the only people in the world.

5up was so mesmerized by the man in front of him that he nearly missed the soft patter of footsteps coming their way. He quickly pulled back and flashed Fundy an apologetic expression before Niki appeared at the entrance of the balcony. Fundy gave him a knowing look and cleared his throat, looking at Niki.

“Fundy, your mother wants to speak with you," She kindly said.

“Of course, Niki.”

Fundy looked back at 5up and smiled before moving away. 5up noticed how his eyes were so full of expressions, he could feel the warm love radiating off him like he was the sun radiating heat. 5up had never felt so loved before. 5up looked back to the nurse, who was beginning to leave.

“Uh, who is his mother?” 5up softly asked.

Niki smiled.

“His mother is the lady of the house. She is a good, wise, and virtuous lady. I took care of her son, who you were just speaking with. The man who marries him will be very wealthy.”

Fuck, he’s from the Dream SMP. 

5up cleared his throat and feigned confusion.

“He wishes to marry a man?” 5up could make his move, just not now.

“Yes, sir. Now if you excuse me, I must go. It was nice to meet you!” Niki promptly walked off the balcony and into the halls.

5up quickly made his way back to the ballroom and was immediately intercepted by Ranboo. 

“Hey, let’s go. It’s best to leave when things are the most fun," He nervously said.

“Yes, but I’m in more trouble than ever," He kissed a man. He was in love with a man. Let alone a man who was from the Dream SMP! And there was nothing he could do about it.

Wilbur, who had been across the room, made his way to the pair and laughed heartily. 

“Gentlemen, don’t leave now. We have dessert coming up!”

The pair looked at each other before Ranboo whispered something in Wilbur’s ear. He let out a small ‘ohh’ before smiling at them.

“Well, I thank you both, honest gentlemen. Good night, then!”

Wilbur looked to the serving-men and made a small hand gesture before they immediately scurried away. Slowly, the guests began to filter out before only two people remained.

Everyone except FUNDY and NIHACHU begins to exit.

“Uh- Niki? Who is that gentleman?” Fundy asked.

Niki looked over to the slowly leaving crowd.

“The son and heir of Duke Stevensuptic.”

Fundy sighed and asked again.

“No, the one going out the door right now.”

“That appears to be young Karl Jacobs.”

“No, the one following over there. The one who wouldn’t dance," Fundy exasperatedly said. Niki finally noticed.

“I’m actually not sure.”

“Could you go and check please?” Fundy asked. Niki nodded and promptly left.

As Fundy waited, he contemplated the events of the last hour. His heart was like a mushy mess and his cheeks felt like they were on fire. 

“If he’s married, I’d rather die than marry anyone else,” He whispered under his breath to nobody in particular.

Niki quickly returned with a slightly concerned expression. 

“His name is 5up. He’s from the Cogchamps house. He’s the son of your worst enemy,” She quickly recounted.

Fuck. The only man I love is the son of the only man I hate! I fell for him like the idiot I am and found out who he was too late. Love is a monster for making me fall in love with my worst enemy.

“Uh- sir? What was that?”

Fundy froze. He didn’t realize that he had been talking aloud, and now Niki was looking at him with confusion plastered over her face.

“Uh- just a rhyme that I learned from someone at the party. Yeah, that’s it.”

A voice immediately boomed through the halls, shouting ‘Fundy!’ Fundy froze, and apologized to Niki.

“Sorry, I have to go. We’ll see each other again like we always do!”

Fundy rushed out of the room, leaving a confused Niki alone in the empty ballroom.

They exit.


	2. act 2

Act 2, Prologue

5up’s old feelings of desire are dying, and new love is eager to take its place. 5up used to say that he would die for Rosaline, but compared to the mesmerizing Fundy, Rosaline doesn’t seem so beautiful now. Now someone loves 5up, and he’s deeper in love than he’s ever been before- both of them falling for each other at the  
speeds of light. 

But he has to make his speeches of love to a man for one thing, and to his enemy for another. And Fundy’s been infatuated by someone he should fear. Because he’s an enemy, 5up has no chance to see Fundy. And Fundy’s just as much in love as he, but he has even less opportunity to meet his lover.

But love gives them power, and time gives them a chance to meet, sweetening the extreme danger with happiness and love. 

Act 2, Scene 1

5UP enters alone.

“Can I really leave when my heart is back there? I have to go back to where my heart is," 5up said to nobody in particular.

5UP moves away, RANBOO and SAPNAP enter.

“5up! Where is that bastard?” Ranboo slightly cringed when Sapnap swore but didn’t say anything about it.

“He’s smart. I bet he left early and went to sleep,” Ranboo quickly said.

“Well, I saw him run this way and jump over this orchard wall. Call him, Ranboo," Sapnap retorted.

“Uh- 5up! Madman! Idiot! Lover! Where are you? Just say something so we know you’re there! Literally anything! Uh, Rosaline is here? Please, just come back so we know you’re not dead.”

“That was a little excessive.”

“What I’m saying won’t anger him. Everything I’m saying is fair and honest. All I’m doing is saying the name of the woman he loves to lure him out.”

“You say that like he’s a dog. Come on, he’s hidden behind the trees to keep the night company. His love is blind, so it belongs in the dark," Sapnap countered.

“If love is blind, then it can’t hit its target. Now he’s gonna go sit under a tree and contemplate on how stupid love is. Good night, 5up. This field is too cold for us to sleep.”

Ranboo looked over at Sapnap, who knew exactly what he was thinking.

“Come on, let’s go.”

“Yeah, there’s no point in looking for him if he doesn’t want to be found" 

And together, they walked into the night, going home and wondering where lover boy 5up had run off to.

SAPNAP and RANBOO exit.

Act 2, Scene 2

5UP returns.

“It’s easy for someone to joke about scars if they’ve never been cut," 5up said to himself, stopping at the small rose garden beneath the balcony leading to Fundy’s room.

Fundy stepped onto the balcony. His face was illuminated in the soft light and his soft, orange hair was now comfortably laying over his shoulders. 

5up looked up and noticed Fundy, smiling and staring into his beautiful ocean blue eyes.

“What’s that light on the balcony up there! It is the east, and Fundy is the sun. Rise up, beautiful sun, and kill the jealous moon. Only the anger of our feuding parents keeps us apart. Let it go, my love. Oh, I wish he knew how much I loved him. I don’t even know how much I love him. Two of the brightest stars in the whole sky had to go away on our business, and they’re asking his eyes to twinkle in their places until they return. If his eyes were in the night sky, they would shine so brightly that the birds would start singing, thinking his light was the light of day. How he leans his hand on his cheek. How I wish I was that glove so that I could touch that cheek.”

5up said this poetically, like he was quoting a story.

Fundy looked into the distance, melancholically smiling and recalling the events of the day.

“Oh, 5up,” He didn’t know that 5up could hear him, but he was happy nonetheless.

5up looked down and smiled, shielding his face from view. 

“He speaks, like the bright angel he is. You shine above me, like an angel sailing high in the air," 5up said.

“Oh, 5up. Why do you have to be from the Cogchamps? Forget about your father and change your name. If you don’t want to, I’ll leave the Dream SMP house. We can run away together, be together forever," Fundy desperately said.

“Should I listen more, or should I speak now?” 5up whispered.

“It’s only your name that’s my enemy. You’d still be yourself if you stopped being from the Cogchamps. What’s a Cogchamp anyway? We’re all just people. Please, just be some other name! What does a name even mean? A rose would smell just as sweet if we used any other name. 5up, you would be just as perfect if you weren’t called 5up. Please, trade your name for a new one and take all of me in exchange." 

5up finally looked up, cupping his hands over his mouth and smiling.

“I trust you, Fundy. Just call me your love and I will take a new name. I will never be 5up again," 5up called.

Fundy confusedly looked around, searching for where the voice had come from. It sounded beautiful, like the voice of an angel, just like 5up’s.

“Who are you? Why do you hide in the darkness and listen to my private thoughts?”

5up smiled.

“I don’t know how to tell you who I am without telling you my name. I hate my name, Fundy, because my name is your enemy.”

“I haven’t heard anything, but I would recognise your voice in an instant. Aren’t you 5up? Aren’t you from the Cogchamps?” Fundy questioned, staring into the distance.

“I don’t want to be either of those things if you dislike them,” 5up said frankly.

Fundy’s face lit up, immediately knowing who was speaking to him.

“How did you get in here? And why? The orchard walls are too high to climb over, and if any of my relatives find you here they’ll kill you for your ancestry."

5up giggled, smiling at Fundy’s cluelessness. 

“Your walls can’t keep my love out. Whatever a man in love can possibly do, his love will make him try to do it. Your relatives are no obstacle,” 5up said calmly.

“If they see you, they’ll murder you,” A concerned Fundy said.

“One angry look from you would be worse than 20 of your relatives with swords. Just look at me with your beautiful eyes and their hate means nothing.”

“I’d give anything to keep them from seeing you here.”

“The dark will hide me from them. If you don’t love me, let them find me here. I’d rather they killed me than have to live without your love.”

Fundy looked down closely, trying to make out 5up’s beautiful face. But he was only a shadow.

“Who told you how to get below my bedroom?” He called down.

“Love led the way, Fundy. Love was what let me look at you first. I would risk more than my life to have you. Also your eyes are very bright." 

“You can’t see my face because it’s dark out,” Fundy said, face reddening, “otherwise, you’d see me blushing about what you’ve said tonight. I would be happy to keep up my good manners and deny everything I’ve said today, but fuck good manners.”

5up’s face heatened as Fundy continued, a smile forming on his face.

“Do you love me? I know you’ll say yes, but you could be lying. They say the gods laugh when lovers lie to each other. Oh 5up, if you really love me, say it truly. If you think it’s too easy to win my heart, I’ll play hard to get for you. Truthfully, I love you too much. Trust me, I’ll prove myself more faithful than the others who act coy and play hard-to-get. I confess, but you overheard me talking about the love in my heart when I didn’t know you were there. You made me love you so easily, idiot.”

Fundy was always cautious. He never trusted people too easily, his heart was too fragile and unprepared, he couldn’t let his guard down. But 5up came along and swept all of his carefully built walls out of the water. With one kiss, 5up had infatuated poor Fundy. And now there was nothing in the way from 5up hurting him all he wanted, Fundy was too mesmerised.

“Fundy, I swear by the moon above. I swear by the moon which dances high in the skies-”

“Don’t swear on the moon. The moon is always changing and shifting, I don’t want you to be that untrustworthy and inconsistent,” Fundy cautiously said.

“What should I swear on then?” 5up asked softly.

“Don’t swear at all. If you have to, swear on your wonderful self, as you shine as bright as the moon itself. Then I’ll believe you," 

“If my heart’s dear love-” Fundy cut him off.

“Don’t swear. You bring me so much joy but I can’t exchange any promises today. It’s too crazy, too abrupt. We haven’t thought at all. It’s too sudden. Our love is a flower bud in the summer air, it may become a beautiful flower when we next meet. I hope you enjoy the same sweet peace and rest I feel right now.”

“Must you leave me so unsatisfied?” 5up said, tilting his head, smiling..

“What satisfaction could you possibly have tonight?” Fundy questioned.

“You could come and kiss me once again. Make a true promise of love." 

“I pledged my love before you asked me to. I wish I could take the promise back so I could make it again,” he grimly replied.

“You would take it back? Why would you do that, my love?” 5up’s head tilted to the side.

“If only I could give you my promise again. I’m wishing for something I already have. My love for you is as limitless as the sea, as deep as the deepest caverns of the ocean. The more love I give you, the more I have.”

Before 5up could reply, Fundy quickly turned around, hearing a sudden knock on his door. The softness of the knock could only mean that it was Nurse Niki. He quickly turned back to 5up, pain and hurriedness filling his beautiful blue eyes.

“I hear something inside. Dear love, goodbye, wait just a moment for me," 

Fundy smiled before turning and stepping off the balcony.

FUNDY exits.

“Holy shit. Is this a dream? This is too sweet to be true,” 5up pondered to himself, hoping this was all real. He reached his hands up and placed them on his face, making sure everything was, in fact, real.

FUNDY enters on his balcony.

“I must sleep for real, 5up. If your love is true and you want to marry me, send me a word tomorrow. I’ll send a messenger for you, and you can send me a message for where and when we’ll be married. I’ll follow you, dear, all over the world," Fundy smiled.

“Fundy, dear!” A voice called from inside the room, just barely audible from where 5up was stood.

Fundy perked up.

“I’ll be right there, Niki!” He called back before turning to 5up.

“If you don’t have honorable intentions, I beg you-”

“Fundy!” Niki called again.

“I’m coming!” He turned back to 5up and sadly smiled.

“I beg you to stop trying for me and leave me. Tomorrow, I’ll send a messenger.”

“Please do. My soul depends on it-” 5up desperately said.

“A thousand times goodnight," Fundy said, trying to sound angry but his voice dripped with fondness for his newfound love. 5up noticed this, and couldn’t stop himself from smiling. Fundy promptly turned around, turning back to give 5up a small wave and smile before leaving into his room.

FUNDY exits.

“I don’t want you to leave. You leaving is a thousand times worse than being near you. I wish I could make you stay. I wish you could stay with me. For me.”

5up sighed and turned, beginning to leave the rose garden. He couldn’t stop a wide grin from forming on his face.

5UP starts to leave. FUNDY returns, on his balcony.

“Wait, 5up!” Fundy called, but 5up had gotten too far away. 

“Oh, I wish I could call you louder. I’m trapped in this house, so I have to be quiet. If I was too loud, my family would kill me.”

Fundy sniffed. 5up grabbed for footholds on the wall and leapt over like a cat. He perched atop the wall and turned back, looking at the house where the beautiful Fundy rested.

“My soul is calling out my name. The sound of lovers calling for each other through the night is as sweet as a rose. It’s the sweetest sound I could ever hear.”

“5up!” 5up flinched, almost falling off the wall before pulling himself back on. He turned back and grinned when he was Fundy calling for him.

“Yes, my rose?” 5up leapt down and walked back to the balcony.

“What time should I send a messenger for you tomorrow?” Fundy shouted.

“By nine sounds good.”

“Good. From now until then seems like twenty years. I’ve uh- forgotten why I called you back," Fundy embarrassedly said, rubbing the back of his neck.

5up smiled and giggled fondly. Fundy’s face became a dark shade of red.

“I’ll uh- wait here until you remember.”

“I’ll just end up forgetting and you’ll have to stand here forever. I’ll only remember how much I love your company.”

“I’ll keep standing then. Even if you forget. I’ll forget I have any other home besides next to you," 5up said softly.

“It’s almost morning, you need sleep. I’m scared if you stay longer I won’t be able to let you go," Fundy sighed.

“I wish I could never go.”

“My love, so do I. I would die for you to remain. Goodnight, 5up. Leaving is such sweet sorrow that I’ll say goodnight until tonight becomes tomorrow," Fundy chuckled.

Fundy laughed and his cheeks shone a bright pink. He waved and mouthed a ‘goodbye’ before stepping off the balcony and shutting the door behind him.

FUNDY exits.

“Sleep well, Fundy. I hope your love remains through the evening. I must go see my priest, and ask for his help.”

5up leapt back onto the wall and sighed lovingly before jumping down on the other side.

5UP exits.

Act 2, Scene 3

BADBOYHALO enters by himself, carrying a basket.

Badboyhalo stepped through his carefully kept garden. Beautiful medicinal plants gleamed with dew as he cautiously weaved between the lines of weeds and flowers.

“The smiling morning is replacing the night. The soft light slowly shines onto this beautiful land. Before the sun burns away the dew, I have to fill this basket with weeds and flowers," He carefully reached down and carefully pulled out some flowers, talking to himself while doing it.

“Plants are born from the earth, and are buried in the earth when they die. So many different flowers and plants bloom from the earth’s depths. Earth provides her children with excellent forms of nourishment. Everything is so different. Herbs, plants, stones, flowers, all have different properties," He picked up a cyan-blue flower and rubbed its soft petals, smiling melancholically, before placing it in his basket.

“There is nothing that’s evil. Everything provides a special quality. Nothing turns bad unless it’s used wrong. Virtue turns to vice if misused. Vice becomes virtue if used correctly.”

Badboyhalo was invested in picking his flowers. The rhythm of reaching down and pulling them out was calming. Sometimes, he can get so invested that he zones out in his speech. He didn’t notice 5up walk into the garden. 

Bad reached down and picked up a small, yellow flower, looking at it with a melancholic expression.

“Inside this weak flower is a poison and a powerful medicine. You smell it, you feel good. You taste it, you die. There are opposites in everything, in humans as well as herbs. Good and evil. When evil leads, death kills like cancer.”

“Uh- good morning Bad!” 5up stepped towards the gardener, watching him perk up and spin around, smiling.

“Hi 5up! Why are you awake so early, is something wrong? Everyone has worries, and worried men don’t get any sleep. But a man or your status shouldn’t have a single care in the world. Since you’re awake this early, you must be upset with some anxiety. If that’s not the case, then there is only one answer. You, 5up, have not  
slept tonight," Bad said, concern lacing his voice.

“Your last guess is right. I met someone sweeter than sleep.”

“Well! Were you with Rosaline?” Bad turned around, intrigued.

“No, I’ve forgotten about her.”

“That’s good, but where have you been?”

“I made a mistake, Bad," Bad placed his basket down and walked over to 5up, placing his hand on the other’s shoulder sympathetically.

“Hey, take your time," He smiled.

“Love screwed me over. I’m in love with my enemy. Even worse, with another man. Someone fell in love with me and I with him. You have the power to cure both of us.”

“You’ll have to tell me plainly.”

5up sighed and spilled his thoughts.

“I love Wilbur’s son. Fundy. We love each other in every way, but I need you to marry us. I’ll tell you more later about how we met, how we fell in love, how we exchanged promises, but now I’m begging you. Please marry us.”

Bad gasped.

“Holy muffin, this is a change! You’ve really given up on Rosaline so quickly, you loved her so much! Even for a man! How many tears did you cry for Rosaline? Now you’ve changed? You can’t expect another man to be faithful when you are so unreliable.”

“You scolded me for loving Rosaline,” 5up countered.

“I scolded you for obsessing over her, not loving her.”

“And you told me to bury my love.”

“I didn’t tell you to get rid of one love and replace her with a man.”

“Please, Bad. The man I love now returns my love. The girl didn’t love me.”

“She very well knew that you were acting like you were in love without knowing what love was,” Bad sighed and rubbed the back of his neck, “Come with me, I’ll help you with your secret wedding. This marriage might be lucky enough to bring the hatred between your families to a close.”

5up smiled and took Bad’s hand, shaking it rapidly.

“Thank you Bad! Let’s get out of here, I’m in a rush.”

Bad smiled and laughed affectionately. He picked up the filled basket with one hand and let 5up lead him out.

“Go wisely and slowly. Those who rush will stumble and fall.”

5up laughed and pulled Bad out of the garden eagerly.

They exit.

Act 2, Scene 4

RANBOO and SAPNAP enter.

“Where the fuck is 5up? Didn’t he come home last night?” Sapnap paced back and forth in front of Ranboo, adjusting his white headband.

“Uh- not to his father’s house. I asked a servant,” Ranboo replied.

“That stupid idiot. Rosaline’s gonna torment him until he goes insane.”

“Sapnap, Philza’s nephew has sent a letter to 5up’s father’s house.”

“Tommy? I bet it’s a challenge," Sapnap knew how hot headed the child was.

“I know 5up, he’ll answer the challenge," Ranboo thoughtfully said. 

“Any man who knows how to write can answer a letter.”

“No, 5up will respond to Tommy. Telling him whether he accepts the challenge.”

“Oh shit. He’s already dead. He has the physical strength of a rabbit. Is he strong enough to face off with Tommy at this point?” Sapnap said, concerned.

“Why? Is Tommy really that strong?” 

“Oh yes. He’s tougher than Wilbur. He might be inconsistent and unpredictable but he fights like an animal. He knows how to turn any argument into a fight, how to twist your words into a threat. He’s a child at heart, always gets what he wants," Sapnap had seen the boy in action, he was annoying but a force to be reckoned with.

“What?” Ranboo, on the contrary, didn’t know Tommy too well.

5UP enters.

“Look, it’s 5up!” Ranboo exclaimed, seeing his friend walk in.

“He’s skinny, and hasn’t got his girl with him. Something’s clearly happened. He looked perfectly fine when we were leaving the party," Sapnap pointed out. “Hey 5up. You faked us out pretty good last night.”

5up perked up and walked over, a smile on his face.

“Good morning you both. What do you mean I faked you out?” 5up questioned.

“You left without telling us! We’ve been worried sick, especially Ranboo," Ranboo smiled and looked at 5up.

“Uh- I’m sorry you guys. I had important business to attend to. It was so important I had completely forgotten about meeting up, I’m really sorry.”

“Ah. Important business," Sapnap raised one of his eyebrows, smiling.

“What are you suggesting?” 

“I’m sure you know," Sapnap smirked.

5up sighed.

“Shut up. You both very well know I’m not into that kind of thing.”

“Yeah, yeah-” 

“Guys, break it up. This joke is stupid," Ranboo cut off Sapnap, turning to 5up.

“You’re implying that I’m only good for jokes,” Sapnap grumbled, making both the others’ laugh. 

“Isn’t this joking is all better than going off about stupid love? Now you’re more like yourself. You’re back to being 5up. My jokes are helping-”

“Come on, guys. Cut it out," Ranboo jumped in again.

“Don’t stop me before I’m done.”

“Your story was getting too long. We have more important matters to attend to.”

“You’re wrong. I was gonna make it short." 

“Guys-” 5up tried to help Ranboo shut Sapnap up before two figures appeared in the corner of his eye.

NURSE NIHACHU enters with her servant, JACK MANIFOLD.

“Finally, here’s something good," 5up groaned, tired of the banter.

“Manifold?” Niki turned to Jack, seeing the three others but not acknowledging them.

“At your service, Niki.”

“Hand me my fan, please," Niki smiled sweetly as Manifold passed her a pink fan with blue swirls.

“Why would she need a fan?” Ranboo whispered to 5up, who merely shrugged in reply.

“Good morning, gentlemen," Niki said kindly, smiling at the three.

“Good afternoon, my lady," Sapnap replied.

“Is it afternoon?” She asked.

“Yes, no earlier. The hand of the clock is pricking noon,” Sapnap winked at the nurse when he finished, though it had no meaning.

“What kind of man are you?” She questioned, a tiny hint of disgust in her voice, which 5up picked up on. He nudged Sapnap, trying to express how much he wanted the other to stop starting fights.

“A man who governs himself, m’lady," Sapnap smiled, a sickeningly artificial smile on his face.

Niki rolled her eyes before turning to Ranboo and 5up. 

“Gentlemen, do any of you know where I can find young Fundy?”

“I could tell you, but me as well as him will both be considered older when you find him," 5up muttered.

The nurse took a moment to process what 5up had said, before giving him an understanding look. 5up didn’t realise that his cheeks were warming before she began to speak again.

“You speak well, dear 5up.”

“Is the worst really well? Very wise," Sapnap had a mocking tone as he turned to the nurse.

Niki ignored him and turned back to 5up. 

“If you’re the 5up I’m looking for, I would like to have a conference with you," Niki’s slight accent made the word ‘conference’ sound like confidence.

“Oh, I’m sure she’ll indite him to a dinner party," Sapnap replaced the word invite with ‘indite’ to mock Niki’s accent. Niki kept her bright smile up.

“I’m sure you understand how high my status is, dear Sapnap. It would be a shame if something were to happen to yours," Niki said sweetly, malice coating her kindly said words. Sapnap remained quiet.

“Uh so- 5up, are you going to your father’s for lunch? Let’s go there," Ranboo tried to recover the conversation by changing the topic.

“Yeah, you guys go ahead. I’ll follow," 5up smiled.

Ranboo waved to 5up and Niki, grabbing Sapnap’s arm and pulling him away. Sapnap glared at Niki before turning and pulling his hand away. They walked away and 5up turned to the kind nurse.

RANBOO and SAPNAP exit.

“Sir, what’s up with the disrespectful one?” Niki asked 5up.

“That’s Sapnap for you. He says more in a minute than he does in a whole month. He would listen to himself talk for hours," 5up said, slightly annoyed.

“Sapnap is kind deep down, I’m sure he is. But he is a disrespectful man on the outside, and he feels the need to butt in and speak wherever he wishes. He has more pride than a king. I can humble him. He doesn’t want to accept his place.”

5up sighed, expecting an explosion of words from the nurse. Niki spoke with a kind tone, almost soothing to the regular listener. All her words felt kind, like she would be shattered as easily as a glass vase.

“And you,” Niki turned to Manifold, “decided to stand there and watch as they mocked me! You didn’t even protect me!” She said sternly.

Jack giggled slightly and smiled.

“If I had seen them mock you, I would have used my sword, believe me. If the law was on my side, I definitely would have," He said coolly.

Niki batted him on the head playfully before turning back to 5up.

“May I have a word with you, sir? My boy Fundy asked me to find you. I’ll keep what he said a secret to myself, but if you lead him on and break his heart, I will come for you. You don’t know the power I have.”

“Nihachu, give my regards to Fundy. I swear-” 

“You have a good heart, dear. I’ll tell him that. He’ll be so happy," Niki cut him off and trailed on.

“What are you going to tell him? You’re barely paying attention." 

“I’ll tell him that you’re proposing to him. I believe that is your intention, dear,” Niki said gently.

5up smiled and nodded.

“Tell him to make a plan to get out of his house and meet me at the garden abbey this afternoon. Badboyhalo will be marrying us. We can perform the wedding in the grand garden.”

Manifold cocked his head, not knowing who Bad was.

“He’s a gardener. Healer, if you will. He has the license to marry people as well,” Manifold nodded and 5up turned back to Niki.

“Here’s some coins, as a thank you,” 5up smiled and passed her a handful of coins. Niki gasped and looked up at him in surprise.

“Oh! Really, it’s okay. I don’t want any pay as long as it makes Fundy happy,” Niki hurriedly said, trying to pass the coins back. 5up pushed them back.

“No please. I insist,” he smiled. Niki sighed and took the coins.

“This afternoon, sir? He’ll be there,” Niki stuffed the coins in her dress pocket and began to leave before 5up called her back.

“Wait Niki! In an hour, one of my men will meet you behind the garden wall and pass you a rope ladder. It’ll help you get in. Then I’ll meet Fundy in secret. I’ll repay you, miss. Send my best regards to Fundy.”

“Of course. One more thing though,” 5up looked back.

“Count Paris wants to marry Fundy. Fundy would rather meet with Tommyinnit than him. Please, don’t break his heart, I see how much he loves you. He says the most beautiful things about you. Don’t make him marry Paris.”

5up smiled and nodded, determined. He was going to give Fundy everything he could. Anything to make the ginger-haired angel happy.

“Of course.”

Niki nodded to Manifold, who took her fan. She waved at 5up, who smiled and waved back. They all left without another word.

They exit.

Act 2, Scene 5

FUNDY enters.

Fundy paced the carpeted floor, hand on his chin. Bright sunlight filtered in through giant , clear, windows and the fresh smell of flowers wafted through the room.

“I sent Niki at nine! Maybe she can’t find him. No, that’s not possible. I wish I could go myself, my love would bring me to him at the highest speeds. It’s noon now! It can’t have taken three hours. Maybe she’s just tired..”

Fundy walked up and down his room before hearing two pairs of footsteps pattering in. He perked up, turning to the door.

NIHACHU and JACK MANIFOLD enter.

Fundy sighed and smiled, walking over to the pair.

“Oh Niki, finally! Did you talk to him? Send Manifold away for a moment,” Niki nodded sweetly and looked to Jack, who nodded and opened the door.

“I’ll be waiting at the gate,” Niki nodded and he left, shutting the door behind him.

JACK MANIFOLD exits.

“Good! Wait, why do you look so sad? What happened? At least tell me what happened with a smile,” Niki sighed and sat down on the desk chair.

“Sorry, I’m just tired. The walk was long and everything aches,” Niki said in between deep breaths.

Fundy grew impatient and tapped his foot on the ground, fiddling with his fingers and tracing the outlines of the indents in the cabinets.

“Come on, please tell me what happened. Please?”

“You’re in such a hurry! Can’t you see that I’m out of breath? Do you really like him that much?” Niki chucked, trying to fix her breathing.

“If you have enough breath to tell me that you’re out of breath, why don’t you tell me what happened? At least tell me if the news was good or bad. Then, I’ll wait for the details. Please, is it good or bad?” Fundy pleaded.

“Okay. You really don’t know how to choose a man. Although 5up may be very handsome and kind, he’s not the most, uh, ‘manly’ choice. He’s gentle, kind, polite. Are you sure he’s really who you want? Oh well, I can see how much you love him. Have you had lunch yet?”

“Not yet. Everything you’ve said is true, but I love him too much to care. What did he say about our marriage? What about that?” His hyperactive brain was running at a mile a minute, almost overwhelming the tired nurse.

“Wow, my head hurts. My entire body hurts so much. I might die at this point,” Fundy laughed with Niki and gave her a moment to calm down.

“I’m sorry you’re in pain. Please, what did my love 5up say?”

“He’s an honorable gentleman, he’s courteous, kind, handsome, and polite. Where is your mother?”

Fundy scoffed and hit his head against the wall.

“Where is my mother? She’s inside, where else would she be? You’re answering so strangely! Just tell me what he said about our marriage!”

Niki took a deep breath, pushing down her annoyance.

“Do you have permission to go out today?”

Fundy eagerly nodded.

“Then hurry up and run to the garden chapel. 5up will be waiting for you there. I can see you blushing from over here. Go on. I must go by a different path to get a rope ladder. He’ll use it to climb to your window when it gets dark. I’ll go get lunch, you go to Badboyhalo’s garden.”

Fundy nodded and grabbed a coat, a formal white shirt and some pants from his wardrobe. He turned back and smiled at Niki.

“Wish me luck then. Thank you Niki!” He raced out of the room, slamming the door behind him. Niki fondly smiled and stood up, leaving behind him.

They exit.

Act 2, Scene 6

BADBOYHALO and 5UP enter.

Multicoloured flowers shone in the soft sunlight, bushy trees secluding the garden. Archways covered the aisle in the center, leading up to a marble floor. The smell of fresh flowers hung in the air, a calming scent.

“5up. May the heavens be happy with this marriage, and may nothing unfortunate happen in the future make us regret it,” Bad started.

“Whatever misfortunes happen, they can’t ruin the joy I feel when I look at him. Just join us in marriage, then death can do whatever it pleases. I just want to call him mine.”

“Be wary, 5up. Sudden love can have sudden endings. They burn up like fire. In a kiss, they explode. Too much honey is delicious, but it makes you sick afterwards. Love in moderation, dear 5up. Too fast is as bad as too slow.”

5up nodded. He heard a rustle in the leaves behind him and turned to see a formally dressed Fundy running towards him, a wide grin on his face.

FUNDY enters in a rush.

Fundy raced across the garden and threw himself onto 5up, embracing him. 5up barely wasn’t knocked down, hugging back and pressing himself as close to Fundy as he could. His heartbeat was soft and calming. He didn’t want to let go.

“Hi,” Fundy smiled and looked into 5up’s beautiful coffee brown eyes.

5up pecked his lips, mostly just to feel the contact. Fireworks still erupted.

“Hey, my bridesmaid,” 5up said jokingly. Fundy giggled and got up, turning to Bad.

“I can see you both are very thankful,” Bad said fondly, staring into the distance melancholically.

Fundy nodded, a wide smile on his face.

“Fundy, I can see you’re just as happy as I am. You’re better with words than me, what happiness do you think we’ll have in our marriage?” 5up asked softly.

“My brain’s running faster than my mouth can talk. True love has made me so rich that I can’t count even half of my wealth.”

Bad felt refreshed. This kind of love was refreshing to see. They were so madly in love that nothing would stop them from being married. It was so genuine, so true.

“Come quickly, I’m not leaving until you two are married. Come along now.”

All three of them laughed before walking away, warmth radiating off the pair.

They exit.


	3. act 3

Act 3, Scene 1

SAPNAP, his page, and RANBOO enter with other men.

“Sapnap, please. Let’s go home. It’s really hot, and if any people from the Dream SMP find us, then we’ll get into a fight,” Ranboo grabbed his arm and pulled him towards a shaded cover.

“You’re like one of those guys who says he doesn’t want to fight and likes flowers and animals but when you draw your sword you’re an animal.”

“Am I really?” Ranboo chuckled.

“Come on, you can be as angry as Tommy when you’re in the mood. You’re just never in the mood, your self control’s too high. Remember that one time when you nearly killed that guy for killing a bee? You were a fucking monster. And you’re teaching me self restraint?” Sapnap said, pulling his arm away.

“If I fought as much as you do, my life insurance rates would be sky high.”

“You idiot,” Sapnap heartily laughed.

TOMMYINNIT, AWESAMDUDE and MORE DREAM SMP MEMBERS enter.

“Oh great. Here come the SMPers,” Ranboo said tiredly.

“I don’t really care, let them say what they need,” Sapnap replied. The group began to walk towards the pair.

“I’m gonna talk to them. Follow me,” Tommy said to his group before walking over to Sapnap and Ranboo.

“Gentlemen. I would like to have a word with one of you,” He said regally.

“Just one of us? Put it together and tell both of us, let’s not waste valuable time unless you want it to be a word and a blow,” Sapnap said, sarcasm lining his tone.

“I’ll be ready enough, sir. If you give me a good reason, I won’t hesitate,” Tommy retaliated.

“We both know you can find a reason without me giving you one.”

“Go back to your new friend 5up, Sapnap,” Tommy said.

“Go back? What, you’re saying we aren’t friends? We both know that’s not true,” Sapnap pulled his gleaming sword out of its sheath, “This might show you otherwise.”

Ranboo grabbed Sapnap’s arm again.

“Sapnap, we’re in public. Either go somewhere private, talk rationally, or we could just leave. Everyone can see us here,” He said with a hushed tone.

“I don’t want to please anybody. I speak for myself, they can watch if they wish,” He pulled away again, flashing Ranboo a dangerous look.

5UP enters.

“There he is. There’s your bitch,” Tommy scoffed, watching as 5up walked over with a confused expression.

“He’s not my bitch. He could kill you with a single slash of his blade,” Sapnap angrily replied.

Tommy ignored him, turning to 5up with a burning glare.

“There’s one thing I can call you and one thing only. A fucking villain.”

“I’m not going to fight you, Tommy. You’re a child, you don’t know what you’re saying. You don’t know anything about me,” 5up said coldly.

“Your words can’t excuse the harm you’ve done. Now draw your sword and fight me, bitch.”

“I disagree. I’ve never done anything to you. You should be satisfied with my words, I love the people from the Dream SMP like I love the people from the Cogchamps.”

Sapnap groaned and stepped between the two, sword pointed at Tommy. He turned back to a confused 5up.

“You’re such a calm and collected person. One move from Tommy and either you’ll be dead or he’ll be dead.”

Sapnap turned back to Tommy, moving his sword slightly closer.

“Will you fight me or not?” Fire burned in Sapnap’s orangey eyes. 

“What do you want, dipshit?” Tommy said, huffing.

“I want to kill you, Tommy. Was it not obvious enough? Get your sword or I’ll kill you before you have yours drawn.”

Tommy’s eyes narrowed and he drew his sword.

“I’ll fight you.”

5up placed his hand on Sapnap’s shoulder, pulling it slightly back.

“Sapnap, put your sword away. We can be rational about this,” 5up begged.

“Come sir, fight like you always do,” Sapnap ignored 5up and smirked, shrugging his hand off and slashing towards Tommy.

5up quickly turned back to Ranboo, heart pounding. He drew his sword and pointed at the fighting duo.

“Draw your sword, Ranboo. We can stop them. Gentlemen, stop this. Prince George banned fighting in the streets of Rozu. Please stop.”

Ranboo nodded, pulling out his sword. 5up held his sword in between the two. They stopped, and 5up stepped between them. 

“What’s the point of fighting?” He questioned.

Tommy scoffed. He pulled his arm back and stabbed it forward. It just reached under 5up’s arm and stabbed into Sapnap’s side. Sapnap gasped, freezing. His sword clattered to the stone paved ground. Awesamdude stepped forward, pulling Tommy away. 

“Tommy, let’s go. There’s no point in continuing this,” Sam whispered. Tommy nodded, and his group ran into the crowded street.

TOMMYINNIT, AWESAMDUDE, and the other people from the DREAM SMP exit.

“Shit.”

5up stepped in front of Sapnap, slowly lowering him to the blood stained ground. Sapnap giggled, looking up at 5up and now joining Ranboo.

“Well this isn’t too good. Did Tommy get injured, at least?” Sapnap laughed, but it seemed more like a cough.

“Are you okay, Sapnap?” Ranboo said, nervousness plastered over his face.

“Yeah, it’s alright. I hopefully won’t die. Page? Go get a doctor,” Sapnap’s page nodded and quickly ran away.

SAPNAP’S PAGE exits.

“It’s fine, the wound shouldn’t be that bad. You’ll survive,” 5up desperately said.

“It’s not that bad, but it’ll get the job done. Tomorrow, I’ll probably be dead. But y’know, it’s not over until it’s over. I’ve done all that I had to in this world, I think. Curse both your houses though! Damn it! Can’t believe fucking Tommy ‘child’ Innit managed to kill me. He fights like a five year old, like he’s just learned how to hold a sword! Why the hell did you come between us?” Sapnap rambled, a good sign that he was still strong.

“I thought it was the right thing to do.”

“Curse both your houses, I hope both of you learn your lesson.”

Sapnap coughed, smiling. Tiny drops of blood spattered on the floor.

“I guess that’s it. I’ll see you guys on the other side.”

“You’re so stupid,” Ranboo said, eyes glistening.

Sapnap smiled, and coughed a last time before his chest went still. Ranboo choked back a sob and picked up Sapnap. His tall stature made Sapnap easy to pick up and he promptly carried the dead Sapnap away.

SAPNAP and RANBOO exit.

“Why did you have to die, Sapnap? You were one of my close friends, you shouldn’t have died protecting me,” 5up said solemnly.

Ranboo entered again, Sapnap now gone. His eyes gleamed with unspilled tears and his hands shook.

“It was too early.”

5up nodded and pulled Ranboo into a hug.

TOMMYINNIT enters.

“He’s back! Why?” Ranboo said.

“Why should he be alive and victorious while Sapnap’s dead? Enough with mercy and rationality. You may call me a villain, but his ghost is waiting for you to join him. It’s either you or me,” Ranboo gasped, realising what 5up was about to do.

“Stop! What if you die? I won’t be able to live with myself.”

5up smiled at Ranboo before walking towards Tommy. Ranboo sighed and gripped his face in his hands, watching Tommy’s every move.

“You took him from the SMP. And now you’re gonna be a ghost with him.”

“Our swords will determine that.”

Tommy swiped towards 5up, who parried the attack and aimed for Tommy’s head. Tommy ducked and shoved his sword up. 5up stared at him in the eyes coldly before their swords clashed. 5up flicked his wrist and in a second, Tommy’s sword was thrown to the side and 5up’s sword was pointed at his chest. Cold indifference blazed in his eyes and Tommy gasped as 5up thrusted the blade into his chest. He froze for a moment before stilling, his eyes remaining wide open.

Ranboo ran to 5up, pulling him away from Tommy’s body. 5up snapped out of his apathetic trance.

“5up, we need to go. The citizens are standing around, and you’ve killed Tommy! Prince George will give you the death sentence! Get out of here!”

5up nodded and raced into the street, leaping up onto a low wall and jumping out of sight.

5UP exits.

QUACKITY enters.

A man wearing a striking blue beanie ran up to Ranboo. The tall boy recognised him to be Sir Quackity, one of Sapnap’s close friends. 

“Where did Tybalt, the murderer, go? Where did the guy who killed Sap go?” Quackity asked quickly.

Ranboo pointed to Tommy’s still body.

“He’s there, sir.”

Quackity gasped and grabbed Ranboo’s arm.

“By the authority of the Prince, you must follow me.”

Ranboo nodded timidly and followed Quackity away. But, before they could leave the scene, a group of people intercepted them.

PRINCE GEORGE enters with DISGUISED TOAST, WILBUR, LADY TOAST, LADY SALLY, and OTHERS.

George took a deep breath and stared at Ranboo, who twitched nervously.

“What the fuck happened, and who started the fight?” George said bluntly.

“Tommy’s lying over there. He killed your relative, Sapnap, and then 5up killed him. It all happened so fast,” Ranboo said softly.

“Tommy was my youngest brother! Prince, you must take revenge for the killing of someone from the Dream SMP,” Wilbur said, shock nearly overwhelming him.

George nodded and turned back to Ranboo, who was struggling to keep his composure.

“Ranboo, who started the fight?” He asked calmly, which made Ranboo feel slightly better.

“Tommy started the fight. 5up spoke to him rationally and tried to dissolve the argument. But he couldn’t make peace with Tommy, who was in an angry mood. Tommy and Sapnap fought. 5up still tried to resolve it and stepped between them. Tommy reached under his arm and stabbed Sapnap. Then Tommy fled.”

Ranboo took a deep breath. George gave him a kind gaze and beckoned him to continue.

“Soon, he came back and 5up wanted revenge. They immediately started fighting and, and before I could break up the fight, Tommy was killed. 5up ran away immediately after. I promise I’m telling the truth.”

Lady Sally spoke up.

“Ranboo is from the Cogchamps. He’s not telling the truth. There were twenty from the Cogchamps there, and those twenty only killed one man. I demand justice. 5up must die for killing Tommy.”

The Prince sighed.

“5up killed Tommy, Tommy killed Sapnap. Who should pay for Sapnap’s life?”

“Not 5up. He was Sapnap’s friend and did the crime justice by killing Tommy,” Toast said.

“And for the crime, I hereby declare 5up exiled from Rozu. Sapnap was my relative, and he’s dead because of your stupid feud. I won’t listen to your excuses. You can’t get out of trouble by crying, so don’t bother. Tell 5up to leave the city immediately. If he is found, he will be killed on sight. Take away this body, and listen. Pardoning killers only leads to more murders.”

Everyone reluctantly agreed. They scattered, and the body was removed. Although the dispute was cleared, a thick fog of tension still remained between the quarreling families.

They exit.

Act 3, Scene 2

FUNDY enters alone.

“Oh I wish night would come quickly. When everyone’s asleep, 5up will come and we’ll be together. Nobody will know. 5up, you’re like a day that comes during the night. You’re whiter than the snow on the black wings of a raven. Calm night, give me my 5up. I miss him so much,” Fundy said wistfully. He heard the door click open and spun around.

NIHACHU enters with the rope ladder.

“Niki! Do you bring news? What’s the news? Is that the rope ladder 5up said to pick up?”

“Yeah, it is,” Niki said, sadness dripping in her voice.

“What’s the news? Why do you look so sad?” Fundy said, concerned.

“He’s dead. He’s been killed. He’s gone,” Niki whispered.

“...what?” Fundy said, voice barely a whisper.

“Who would have thought it would be 5up? Why would it be him?” Fundy gasped, his vision blurring.

“5up’s dead? Are you just torturing me? Has he killed himself? Please tell me he hasn’t.”

“I saw the wound with my own eyes. A pitiful corpse. Pale as ashes and drenched in red. I almost fainted.”

Fundy froze. His mind was running but he couldn’t think of anything to say. The air was rushing away from his body.

“Is he really dead? Can I really live now that he isn’t? I’ll never be able to live, to think of anything other than him. Our bodies will lie together in one coffin.”

“Oh Tommy. He was not the best character, but he was still a child. An honorable child. He died too early.”

“What? Has 5up died, and is Tommy dead too? 5up was my husband!” Fundy cried.

“Tommy is dead, and 5up has been banished. 5up killed Tommy because Tommy killed Sapnap, and his punishment was banishment,” Niki said, pulling Fundy into a hug.

“Oh my God.” 

Niki let Fundy tremble in her arms, patting his back comfortingly. Fundy took deep, shaky breaths to try and level his breathing.

“How did he switch up so quickly? He’s a raven with the feathers of a dove, a wolf in a sheep’s clothing! He’s the opposite of what he seemed.”

“How can you trust him now? All men lie, cheat, they’re all wicked. Shame on him!” Niki exclaimed, earning a sharp glare from Fundy.

“He’s an honorable man! And I love him! I shouldn’t have gotten mad at him.”

“You’re going to say good things about the man who killed Tommy?” Niki said.

“Am I supposed to say bad things about my husband? Why would he kill Tommy, if not for revenge? I’m happy that 5up’s alive, but I’m sad that Tommy’s dead. The banishment is worse than if Tommy died a thousand times. Saying 5up is banished is like saying that my parents, Tommy, 5up, and myself have all been killed. Where are my father and mother, speaking of them?”

“They’re crying over Tommy’s death. Will you join them? I can take you there,” Niki said kindly. 

Fundy silently looked down, blue diamond eyes gleaming sadly. His hair was unkempt and his clothes were crumpled. Niki smiled sadly and patted his head, ruffling his soft orange hair.

“You stay in here. I’ll find 5up to comfort you, I know where he is. Your 5up will be here tonight, I promise. He’s hiding out with Badboyhalo.”

Fundy perked up, running across the room and opening a drawer. He pulled out a small, velvet box. 

“When you find him, please give him this ring! Tell my rose to come here and say goodbye.”

Niki nodded, taking the box and placing it in her leather bag.

They exit.

Act 3, Scene 3

BADBOYHALO enters.

“5up, the coast is clear. Trouble really loves you, doesn’t it?” Bad said fondly. 5up stepped out from the shadows.

5UP enters.

“What’s the news, Bad? What did the prince announce?” He said, worry evident in his eyes.

“His punishment was not as severe. You won’t die, but you’ll be banished from the city,” Bad said softly, trying to bring the news on slowly.

“Banishment? You might as well have said death. Exile is worse than death.”

“The world is broad and wide. There are many places you could go.”

“There’s no world for me outside Rozu. To be banished from Rozu is like being banished from the world, it’s worse than death,” 5up said sorrowfully.

“5up! You’re being unthankful! You committed a crime punishable by death, but Prince George took sympathy on you and ignored the law. He gave you banishment instead of death. You don’t even realise the mercy you’re receiving.”

“It’s torture, not mercy. Fundy lives here. Any inferior animal like a fly or a moth will be able to see him, but I can’t. It’s unfair, Bad. Being alone in an unfamiliar world without my Fundy is worse than death, I’m sure you can understand.”

Bad looked into 5up’s eyes with a hint of sadness in his eyes.

“You’re being foolish, listen for a moment.”

5up rolled his eyes.

“Oh, come on. You’re just gonna start talking about banishment again,” 5up groaned.

“I’ll give you a solution to your trouble: gardening! The soft flowers will comfort you through your banishment!” Bad said happily.

“You’re still talking about being banished! Forget about your flowers. Unless they can bring me Fundy, reverse George’s punishment or move a town, then it wont do me any good.”

“Stop ignoring what I’m saying! You’re deaf!” Bad exclaimed, a slight jolt running through 5up.

“Let me talk to you about your situation.”

“You can’t talk to me about something you don’t feel. You’ve never been in love, with someone from an opposing house and a man! If you had murdered someone, then been banished and not been able to even meet with your lover, maybe then you’d know what I mean.”

Bad opened his mouth to respond, but a faint knock on the heavy wood door made them both fall silent.

“Go, hide. Someone’s knocking,” Bad softly pushed him away, towards a giant wood cabinet, blocked by some boxes with a faint cyan tint.

5up nodded and ran into the closet. Once Bad assured that he couldn’t be seen, Bad called to the person behind the front door.

“Who is it?”

“I come from Fundy, I know 5up’s in here.”

Bad gasped and opened the door. 

“Niki! Come in!”

Niki smiled and stepped in, closing the door behind her.

“Bad, where’s 5up?” She asked.

“Right here, Niki. How’s Fundy doing, what does he think of the news? Is he okay? Did my killing of Tommy break his love for me? Please tell me he’s okay. Does he even know that I’m here?” 5up rambled on as Niki and Bad watched fondly.

“He feels nothing but sadness, and hope that you will return to him,” Niki said, leaving out the finer details.

“Please tell him I’m coming. Tell my rose that I’m ready for whatever he has to say.”

“Of course. He misses you very much. I’m sure the news will make his mood lighten.”

5up nodded, smiling.

“Sir, before I go. Fundy asked me to give you this. He said to come as soon as you can. Bye, now!”

Niki placed the velvet box in 5up’s palm before rushing out of the door, shutting it behind her.

NIHACHU exits.

5up opened the tiny box to reveal a silvery ring. It had swirling gold indents, and on the top sat a ruby in the shape of a rose. 5up’s eyes lit up and he smiled, slipping the ring onto his left ring finger. He looked at it carefully, studying its perfectly carved shape. The rose was almost a heart shape, and the swirls looked like the fox mask which his Fundy wore on the day they met. Tiny leaves were engraved on the inside surface of the ring, which made 5up question how he managed to get something this beautiful. But 5up was thankful.

“Come now, you need to go before the watchmen arrive. When you leave, I’ll send a servant to update you now and again in case your exile is lifted. Goodbye, 5up.”

5up smiled, waving to Bad before opening and closing the door silently, running into the night.

They exit.

Act 3, Scene 4

Enter WILBUR, LADY SALLY and DREAM.

“We’ve been unlucky, Dream. These times are desperate, as you might have heard. We haven’t had the time to convince Fundy to marry you, he may be nervous of coming out to the public of Rozu. He was good friends with Tommy, and he was my brother. I’m afraid he won’t be coming down today, he’s been locked in his room  
the entire day,” Wilbur said sadly.

Dream nodded.

“Times of pain are bad for marriage. I’m sure your house is wracked with grief, I hope you may recover soon.”

“Of course, we are a strong house,” Sally replied strongly.

“Indeed. Goodnight Sir, Madam. Send my regards to Fundy,” He said regally.

“We will. I will find out what he thinks about marriage early tomorrow. Tonight, I doubt he will come out of his room,” Sally added.

“Sir Dream, I’ll tell Fundy. I’m sure he’ll do what I say. Sally dear, visit his room before you sleep. Tell him about his upcoming marriage with Dream. Tell him Wednesday- wait no- what day is it today?” Wilbur questioned.

“Monday, sir.”

“Then maybe not Wednesday, that’s too soon. Let’s say Thursday. On Thursday, he’ll be married to Dream. Will you be ready? It shouldn’t be that big a celebration, we don’t want to throw Fundy’s… ‘preference’ out there, and Tommy’s just died. We’ll have around half a dozen people. What do you think about Thursday, Dream?”

“Thursday sounds perfect, Wilbur,” Dream smiled.

“Well, off you go then.”

Dream nodded and bowed, stepping towards the grand oak doors and pushing them open, the door slamming behind him.

“Visit Fundy before you sleep, get him ready for his wedding. I’m off to bed then.”

The pair walked towards the grand stairs, a clock chiming eleven times in the background.

They exit.

Act 3, Scene 5

5UP and FUNDY enter on a balcony.

“I feel like your house has loads of balconies,” 5up chuckled, looking into Fundy’s shining eyes.

“Yeah, it does. One in every room,” Fundy said bashfully, turning away.

“So uh, are you really going? It’ll be a while until daybreak. You can stay for a bit longer, right?” Fundy asked.

“My rose, there’s light coming through the clouds. The night’s nearly over. If I stay, they’ll find me and I’ll die,” 5up tucked Fundy’s silver strand of hair behind his ear.

“It’s not daylight, dear. Those are the stars, shining through the clouds. Just stay a bit longer, please. I don’t want to leave you yet,” Fundy took 5up’s hand and held it to his chest.

“You know I don’t want to leave either,” 5up said sadly.

NIHACHU enters.

“Fundy.”

Fundy and 5up quickly split, standing on opposite sides of the balcony. Fundy took a deep, relieved breath after seeing that it was Niki.

“Yes, Niki?”

“Your mother is coming to the bedroom, day is breaking. Be careful, you two.”

Niki waved and closed the door, leaving the room.

NIHACHU exits.

5up looked sadly at Fundy, who looked like he was about to cry. 

“Can I get a kiss before you go?” Fundy asked softly.

5up’s heart became mushy once again, and he picked up Fundy and sat the boy on the balcony rail. He placed his hands on Fundy’s hips and softly pressed his lips to the other’s. Fundy cupped 5up’s face, deepening it then pulling away. 5up smiled, and pecked Fundy’s lips again. Then again, and again. 

“I don’t want to go, I’ll miss you” 5up said sadly.

“I’ll miss you too, more than I would miss the stars if they disappeared. I know we’ll see each other again.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“Our love is stronger than death, dear 5up.”

“I love you, my rose,” 5up said.

“I love you too. We’ll see each other again, and look back on these moments like fond memories.”

5up nodded, pink dusting his cheeks. He dropped the rope ladder down and, after giving Fundy one last chaste kiss, jumped down.

5UP exits.

“Fundy? Are you awake?” Fundy flinched and spun around, hearing his mother call for him from behind the door.

“Mother? Come in!” The door clicked open and Sally stepped in.

LADY SALLY enters.

“Okay, what’s going on Fundy?” She said, getting straight to the point.

“I’m not feeling well,” Fundy said.

“You can’t cry about Tommy’s death forever. He was your youngest uncle, but crying about it won’t do anything to bring him back. A little grief shows love, but too much shows stupidity,” She lectured.

“Let my cry about a loss, is there an issue with that?” Fundy snapped, immediately bracing himself for what was to come.

“You may feel sad, but the man you cry for will feel nothing,” She said simply.

“I can’t help myself.”

“How about the villain that killed him? He’s still alive.”

“What villain, mother?” Fundy questioned, sounding as oblivious as he could.

“That villain, 5up.”

“Uh, I hope I can get the revenge that he deserves! He killed one of my closest friends!” Fundy exclaimed, lying through his teeth. Thankfully, his skill in lying far exceeded his nervousness.

“We’ll arrange our revenge. I’ll send a man to Kinoko, where that exiled rogue is living. He can poison 5up’s drink, so he will join Tommy in death. Then, we’ll be satisfied,” Sally said happily.

“I uh- won’t be satisfied until I can see him… dead. Mother, if you could fix a man to deliver the poison, I’ll brew it myself so he will die as soon as he drinks it. I want to take out all my anger for Tommy on him,” Fundy exclaimed, lying more.

“That can be arranged. But now, I have news for you.”

“What’s the news?” Fundy asked nervously.

“Early Thursday morning, at the grand chapel, you will be married to the noble Count Dream.”

Fundy groaned, sitting down on a chair. 

“Dream won’t make me a happy groom. I’m thankful, but how can I marry him if I don’t feel anything towards him? Tell my father I don’t want to marry yet. When I do marry, I’d prefer to marry 5up over Dream, 5up! Who I hate!” He complained.

“Go ahead and tell your father then. See how he takes the news.”

WILBUR and NIHACHU enter.

“Speaking of your father. Go on, tell him.”

Wilbur and Niki looked at Fundy expectantly. Fundy was desperately trying to come up with something that sounded acceptable.

“Fundy won’t agree. He says thank you but refuses,” Sally said, starting the conversation.

“Wait. I don’t understand. How could you refuse? Aren’t you grateful to have such a perfect groom? You are so unworthy beneath him, we’ve even come through and given you a groom! You should be grateful!” Wilbur said, tone raising.

“I’m not proud of what you’ve found for me, but I’m thankful. I’m happy that you found someone respectable, but I don’t like him,” Fundy retorted.

“What is your logic? You say you’re happy and thankful, then you say you don’t like him? You’re spoiled! We compensate for your wants by getting you a man, a noble man, and you’re still not grateful? You’re not giving me any thanks at all! Well, you’re going to be thankful. You’re going to marry Dream on Thursday, and if you don’t go, I’m going to make you go,” Wilbur shouted.

“Father. Please let me say one thing.”

“No. I’m tired of you being disobedient and spoiled. And don’t you dare show me this attitude. You disgust me.”

“Don’t berate Fundy like that! He’s allowed to have free will,” Niki cut off Wilbur, giving him an almost murderous look. Wilbur ignored her.

“Shut up. Go spend your time on something else,” Wilbur said angrily.

“Can’t I say something? Everything I’ve said has been right.”

“Every day I work, hour after hour, and my top priority has always been to find Fundy a husband. It’s been especially hard, trying to find someone who fits his wants. And now I’ve provided a husband who has so many good qualities, and all this child does is whine about how he doesn’t like the perfect man I’ve gotten him. I promise you, if you don’t keep this promise, you won’t be allowed to live in my perfect home any more.”

Wilbur left angrily, slamming the door behind him. Fundy flinched.

WILBUR exits.

“Mother, I-”

“Don’t talk to me. I don’t want to hear it. I’m done worrying about you, Fundy,” Sally said, leaving behind her husband.

LADY SALLY exits.

“Oh my god. My husband’s alive and I love him, how can I marry Count Dream? Don’t you have any comforting words? Anything at all? Please?” Fundy desperately said to Niki.

“All I have to say is: 5up’s been banished. He won’t be able to challenge you. You should marry Count Dream, you might even be happier after coming out to the people and having Dream to yourself.”

Fundy paused. 

“Tell my mother that I’ve left. I made Wilbur angry, so I’m going to think about what I’ve done.”

Niki nodded. 

“That’s a good idea. I’ll go.”

Niki stepped out, softly closing the door. Fundy sighed, falling onto his bed. Unspilled tears never left his eyes.

NIHACHU exits.

“Who does she think she is, asking me to break my vows for someone I don’t even like! I’m going to go ask Bad, perhaps he’ll know what to do. If all else fails, I have to take extreme measures.”

Fundy rubbed his eyes, sniffing. He stepped up, took a deep breath and left the room.

FUNDY exits.


	4. act 4

Act 4, Scene 1

BADBOYHALO and COUNT DREAM enter.

“Thursday, sir? That’s very soon.”

Dream shook his head, kicking a pebble from under his shoe.

“It’s how Wilbur wanted it, and who am I to complain?” He replied plainly.

“Fundy doesn’t seem too interested.”

“He’s grieving too much over Tommy’s death. I haven’t had the chance to talk to him about love. Wilbur’s smart, trying to stop him from being sad by arranging our marriage. He’s awfully sad about someone who he barely knew, but I shouldn’t be one to judge. I’m sure you know something about love,” Dream rambled. 

Oh, I wish I didn’t know why Fundy isn’t interested, Bad thought.

“Here comes Fundy now!” Bad exclaimed.

FUNDY enters.

Fundy stepped in, noticing Dream and groaning in annoyance. 

“Good day, my future husband,” Dream said smugly, looking at Fundy with a small, thin grin.

“That might be the case after I’m married, sweetheart,” Fundy retorted.

“Of course, darling, that ‘might be’ becomes ‘will be’ on Thursday.”

“Fuck you,” Fundy snapped. Bad whispered a tiny “language!” under his breath.

“You love me. Don’t deny it.”

Fundy didn’t reply.

“Your face has cried so much, hasn’t it?” Dream said, as if he were purposefully trying to get something out of Fundy.

“My tears haven’t done much. My face looked bad enough before I started to cry.”

“Don’t berate yourself, dear. Our faces are one and the same, and you’re slandering it like it’s nothing.”

Fundy ignored Dream, turning back to Bad.

“Bad, do you have a moment? Or should I come back later?”

“I have some time now. Dream, I must ask you to leave us for a moment.,” Bad smiled, turning to Dream.

“Of course, Bad. Fundy, I’ll see you on Thursday, my pretty.”

Dream took Fundy’s left hand, pressing his lips to it softly. He let go of the hand and waved, then left the flowered garden.

DREAM exits.

“Come, this way. I’d prefer we discussed in private.” 

Fundy nodded, following Bad into his cobblestone house. Wood lined its edges and trapdoor windows lined its walls. They entered and Bad shut the door behind them.

“This is such a mess,” Fundy groaned, head in his hands.

“This is a big problem. You have to marry the count, nothing can delay it,” Bad said.

“Please, Bad. Please help me find a way to prevent this marriage. I’m begging you, I don’t want to marry Dream, 5up is the only one I love. I would kill myself if I was unfaithful to him.”

Bad thought for a moment, before perking up. He ran into the cobble walls and emerged after a minute with a glass vial. The vial swirled with gray-blue liquid, sparkling in the dim lantern light.

“Okay, Fundy. This is the only best way. It might involve… being on the verge of death.”

Fundy shuddered but nodded, curious.

“I’ll do anything, anything you ask. As long as it lets me remain faithful to 5up, I’ll do it, no matter how risky it may be,” He said, nervous but determined.

“Okay, listen closely. Tell them that you agree to marry Dream. Then, tomorrow night, which is Wednesday, make sure you’re alone. Not even the nurse Nihachu can stay with you.”

Fundy nodded, and Bad passed him the glimmering vial.

“When you’re about to sleep, mix the contents of this vial with a liquor and drink it. Your pulse will stop, your body temperature will go down, you’ll stop breathing. You’ll appear dead for forty two hours.”

Fundy nervously nodded.

“Afterwards, you’ll wake up as if you were just sleeping. When Dream sees you Thursday, you’ll look dead. According to custom, you’ll be dressed in your best clothes, placed in an open coffin and carried to the Dream SMP tomb.”

“How will 5up be told? He’d die if he thought I was dead,” Fundy asked.

“I’ll send a messenger to 5up to tell him about the plan. He’ll keep watch until you wake up, that man is like a hawk. When you wake up, he’ll take you away to Kinoko. If you don’t change your mind, the plan will work and you’ll be safe and happy together,” Bad concluded.

Fundy nodded, holding out his hand.

“Pass me the vial, I’ll do it.”

Bad nodded, smiling. He passed the boy the vial, which was surprisingly warm to the touch.

“Be strong. I’ll send Skeppy to Kinoko to notify 5up.”

Fundy nodded, wrapping his arms around Bad in a hug. Bad returned the hug. Fundy let go and ran out of the door. 

“Thanks Bad!”

They exit.

Act 4, Scene 2

WILBUR enters with LADY SALLY, NIHACHU, and two or three SERVINGMEN.

Wilbur passed the first servingman, Antfrost, a piece of paper.

“Invite all the guests on this list.”

Ant nodded, spinning and racing out of the room.

“And you, hire some cooks. I’d say fifteen to twenty.”

“I won’t disappoint, sir.”

The second server, who was called Hannah Rose, left as well.

Wilbur turned back to Niki, a tired and pissed expression on his face. He pinched the bridge of his nose, pushing up his round glasses.

“We’re too unprepared for this shit. Has my son gone to Badboyhalo?”

“Yes, sir,” She confirmed.

“Well, there’s a chance for him to do something of use instead of moping around like the child he is.”

FUNDY enters.

“Speak of the devil. There he comes, he looks happy,” Niki pointed out as Fundy stepped in, a refreshed look on his face.

“Where have you been Fundy?” Wilbur sighed, removing his glasses to clean them.

“I spoke to Badboyhalo, father. He said that I should have known better, and to follow whatever my parents say. Please, forgive me for my disobedience.”

Wilbur nodded. 

“Send for Count Dream, then. The wedding will happen tomorrow morning.”

“I met Dream when I was speaking with Badboyhalo, I treated him with love as well as I could.”

“I’m glad you’re finally repaying the favor you owe me. You should be grateful that I kept your desire and got you a man.”

Fundy looked down, nodding slightly.

“Send for Count Dream, tell him I would like to see him,” Wilbur turned to the third server, a man named Callahan. Callahan nodded, running out.

“Niki, will you assist me in choosing my clothes for tomorrow?” Fundy kindly asked Niki. She nodded.

“Nihachu, go with him. We’ll hold the wedding at the church tomorrow.”

FUNDY and NIHACHU exit.

“Our supplies will be short. It’s almost night,” Sally said to her husband, concern lacing her soft voice.

“Don’t worry, Sally. Everything will be alright. You should check up on Fundy. I’m going to check some things in my office.”

Sally smiled, giving Wilbur a small kiss before leaving the room.

LADY SALLY and WILBUR exit.

Act 4, Scene 3

FUNDY and NIHACHU enter.

Niki held up a dark suit, tinted orange, with a navy blue tie and rose to put in his pocket.

“Yes, that looks good.”

Niki nodded, putting the clothes in the closet, ready for the wedding.

“Niki, is it alright if you leave me alone tonight? I want to prepare myself for what’s to come with Dream.”

Before Niki could answer, the door clicked open.

LADY SALLY enters.

“Fundy? Do you need any help?” She asked, peeking her head around the doorway.

“We’ve figured out what to wear for the ceremony. If it’s alright with you, could you leave me alone? Let Niki stay with you tonight. I would like some privacy the day before, if that’s alright,” Fundy asked sweetly.

“Of course, good night. Get enough rest for tomorrow.” 

Sally smiled, waving and pulling Niki out. They shut the door and Fundy was alone once again.

LADY SALLY and NIHACHU exit.

Fundy took a deep, shaky breath. His hands trembled as he took out the vial, examining its contents. Fundy wasn’t much of a potion brewer, he had no way of knowing what Bad put in the potion. 

What if the potion didn’t work? What if he was forced to marry Dream tomorrow? What if Bad’s trying to kill me because he’s disgraced that I would marry Dream after marrying 5up? What if I die of suffocation in the tomb? If I wake up too early, what if I go insane after being trapped in the dark?

Fundy slapped himself. No. I’m going to do this.

“For 5up.”

Fundy smiled, drinking the contents of the vial. He placed the vial in a secluded drawer before the effects kicked in. He softly laid himself on the bed and braced himself. Soon, the world began to blur. His vision was tinted white and his eyes shut. His last remaining thought was: I’ll see you soon, 5up.

Act 4, Scene 4

LADY SALLY and NIHACHU enter.

“Could you go out and buy some spices for the meal?” Sally asked.

“They’re calling for more helpers in the kitchen.”

The room was filled with the chatter of servants, and the sounds of plates and glasses clinking overflowed from the room.

WILBUR enters.

“Come on, why isn’t everything ready yet? Niki, go get the baked goods. Don’t worry about the pricing.”

“Wilbur, go sleep. You’ve been up all night thinking. Go and rest,” Niki said sweetly.

“No, no, not at all. I’ve stayed up all night for more important matters. I haven’t gotten sick. I’ll be fine.”

“Sure, sure. Make sure you don’t stay up much longer,” Sally said. 

With that, Sally took Niki’s arm and pulled her out of the room. 

LADY SALLY and NIHACHU exit.

“Guess I’m alone again,” Wilbur muttered, walking around the room and checking on the servingmen.

Wilbur noticed two servants bickering. He remembered their names were Connor and Hbomb. 

“Gentlemen, what are these for?” He looked in between the two.

“Things for the cook, sir. I don’t know what they are, though,” Hbomb replied.

“Well, hurry up then.”

Wilbur walked away, but listened in to their conversation anyway.

“You fetch the ones which are drier, Manifold should know where they are,” Hbomb said to Connor.

“I can find them myself, but I’ll keep Manifold in mind in case I need him,” Connor replied dryly.

Wilbur laughed to himself, looking at a giant window. Bright sunlight shone through, providing light to the entire room.

“Shit, it’s already daylight. Dream will get here soon, at least he said he would.”

Wilbur looked up and called towards the living quarters.

“Niki!”

As if on cue, Niki re-entered the room.

“Sir?”

“Go wake Fundy, make sure he’s ready. I’ll go chat with Dream. Hurry on, now!”

Niki ran off, and Wilbur looked back at the crowded room. Dream was going to arrive any moment now.

They exit.

Act 4, Scene 5

NIHACHU enters.

Niki walked down the carpeted hallway, turning towards a wooden door. She knocked softly, careful to not be too loud and make Fundy angry.

“Fundy dear? Could you wake up?” Niki asked, slightly loudly in case he was still asleep.

She didn’t get any reply, not even footsteps.

“Fundy, you can sleep in tomorrow. Count Dream is waiting!” No reply.

Niki didn’t like barging into a room without knocking and getting an answer, but today was an important day and Fundy was sleeping for far too long. Niki clicked open the door, stepping into the room. She looked over, seeing Fundy still in yesterday’s clothes, passed out on the bed.

“Fundy. You’re still in your clothes, you must have been quite tired.”

She reached out to softly nudge Fundy, but when she touched him, his arm was cold to the couch. She quickly pulled her hand away and tried again, placing her entire hand on his shoulder. Cold. 

“Someone, come here! It’s an emergency!” She called out, turning back to Fundy and feeling his forehead. It was freezing.

LADY SALLY enters.

“What’s going on in here?” Sally appeared in the doorway, seeing Niki’s scared and sad face.

“Look at him! He’s cold, and not breathing! What do you think?” Niki snapped, making Sally flinch back.

“He can’t be dead! Help! Anyone!” Sally called.

WILBUR enters.

“What’s happening, get Fundy out here!” Wilbur said angrily.

“He’s dead. He’s dead. He’s dead,” Niki whispered.

“He’s dead, Wilbur!” Sally said sorrowfully.

“No. He can’t be dead, he was just fine yesterday!” Wilbur said.

Wilbur ran to Fundy, feeling his forehead and trying to shake him awake.

“He’s cold, he’s breathing, his blood isn’t circulating. How did this happen, how is he dead? This day was supposed to be happy, joyful!” Wilbur cried.

BADBOYHALO and DREAM enter.

“Is Fundy ready to go to the church?” Bad asked, cocking his head at the sight of the group.

“He’s dead! He’s gone forever!” Sally cried. Dream froze, and Bad ran over to the other side of the bed to look at Fundy.

“I’ve waited for so long for the moment when I can marry dear Fundy, and this is what I see?” He said, disbelief filling his tone.

“He was too young. He was my only child, and now he’s dead! I don’t know how I can live with myself,” Sally said.

“My love is dead,” Dream whispered.

“He’s been killed! Why did he have to die now! He was still my baby!” Sally exclaimed. Wilbur was shocked. 

“Everyone, be quiet! Your crying and yelling will do nothing! If you had done something about it, maybe he wouldn’t be dead! Now he’s in a better place. You can’t prevent him from dying, it was bound to happen eventually. According to the custom, carry him to the tomb. It’s natural to cry about death, but he’s in a better place now,” Bad said. 

“Now, everything we’ve prepared for the wedding will be used for the funeral. The happy music will become sad, the banquet will become a sad burial feast. The bridal flowers will cover the corpse. Everything will be reversed,” Wilbur said sadly.

“Well, we’ll go and prepare the corpse. Stop moping,” Bad said. 

Dream picked up Fundy, carrying him out with the rest of the group following slowly behind him.

WILBUR, LADY SALLY, DREAM, NIHACHU and BADBOYHALO exit.


	5. act 5

Act 5, Scene 1

5UP enters.

“Hopefully, good news comes today. I had a dream that Fundy was here, and we were on a balcony, like always. I miss him. I miss my Fundy. Hopefully, I can see him soon.”

5up paced up and down the room, dim lantern light emitting from the walls.

5UP’s helper TUBBO enters.

“Oh, Tubbo! Do you have news from Rozu? Is it a letter from Toast? How’s my husband, is my father well? How’s my Fundy?” He asked quickly. 

Tubbo looked down sadly.

“Fundy sleeps in the SMP tomb. He died last night, and I came to give the news. I’m sorry, but it was my job to tell you,” He said sorrowfully.

“...Is this true?” 5up asked quietly. 

Tubbo nodded.

5up paused. He stood frozen, staring at the floor.

“I’m leaving for Rozu tonight. Hire some horses, you’re coming with,” He said simply, eyes glued to the floor.

“No! Have patience, Cup. You’re going to hurt yourself,” Tubbo exclaimed. 

“Tubbo.”

Tubbo sighed. He knew the tone of 5up’s voice, the man wasn’t one to be argued with. 

“...Fine.” 

“Do you have a letter from Bad?” He asked plainly.

“No.”

“Then go hire the horses. I’ll be there right away.”

Tubbo nodded, running out of the room.

TUBBO exits.

“I’m thinking bad thoughts, dear Fundy. But I can’t live without you. I know a pharmacist nearby, he goes by the name of Karl Jacobs. He may be younger than most brewers, but he knows what he’s doing. His store was always dusty and had strange objects hanging from his ceiling. He also makes the best poisons, I don’t know how he does it. He might be able to sell some to me,” 5up said to himself, as though speaking to a ghostly Fundy.

5up went out, walking through the streets. The roads of Kinoko were more civil than Rozu, their brick roads and cobble paths much more well maintained. 

Soon, he reached a tiny brick apartment, 3 stories high, on the side of the road. ‘Karl’s Apothecary’ was on a wooden sign with gold writing, hung to the side of the shop entrance. The apothecary was closed, but Karl was running around, placing items on shelves and getting dangerously close to dropping glass objects.

5up stepped towards the entrance, opening the door. A tiny bell rang and Karl emerged from behind a wall of shelves.

KARL JACOBS enters.

“Good day, sir. In case you didn’t notice, the store is closed,” Karl said kindly, though he was clearly using his customer voice.

“I have forty dollars. Could you get me the best poison you have?” 5up said blankly, not bothering to sugarcoat his words.

Karl blinked, surprised. 

“I do have an inventory of lethal potions. However, selling them in Kinoko is illegal, and is punishable by death.”

“If you don’t tell anyone, nobody will find out, Mr Jacobs. I know that you are not the richest,” 5up smiled, holding out the bag of coins.

Karl hesitated, weighing his options. After a moment, he took the coins.

“I’ll do it. Not because I want to, but because I need money to run this place,” Karl counted the coins, and after confirming that there were forty, looked back at 5up.

“And nobody hears of this.”

Karl ran into the walls of shelves, throwing the bag of coins on his desk. He stopped at a high shelf, picking a dark orange potion bottle. He walked back to 5up, careful not to drop the liquid, before handing it to 5up.

“Drink this down with anything. It’ll kill instantly,” he stated plainly, though 5up could detect a slight nervousness.

“Calm down, Jacobs. Use that money wisely. I thank you for this. Nobody hears of what happened in here, understood?” Karl nodded, and 5up left the store, putting the potion into a concealed pocket in his coat.

They exit.

Act 5, Scene 2

AWESAMDUDE and SKEPPY enter.

“So Sam, I have a proposition.”

Sam hummed, walking through the streets of Kuroba with Skeppy.

“I want you to come with me to Kinoko. Bad wants me to deliver a message to some 5up over there, and I want you to come with,” Skeppy explained.

“Hm, that’s the one kinda close to Rozu right?” He asked.

“That’s the one.”

Sam paused, thinking. He had never been to Kinoko before, and it would be cool to see the newly developed city. Well, it wasn’t that new, just a couple months.

“I’ll think about it. The architecture seems interesting,” Sam said thoughtfully.

Skeppy groaned, pulling Sam’s arm.

“Sam! It’s really urgent, we can’t be standing around looking at buildings and that shit.”

“But it’s interesting-”

ERET enters.

“Gentlemen! Please tell me, where you are from?” Skeppy spun around to see a man with a royal attire and black glasses.

“Uh, I’m from Rozu. Sam’s from here. Why, is something wrong?” Skeppy said, pointing back at Sam.

“The King’s sources say that there has been a plague outbreak from Rozu’s neighboring cities. Our city is still relatively new, so we must take precautions to ensure our city does not, you know, fall into a permanent state of sickness and anarchy,” The man quickly explained.

Sam nodded.

“So what do we have to do?”

The man gingerly smiled, turning around and calling over four guards.

“We need to put you under immediate quarantine.”

The guards immediately surrounded Sam and Skeppy, holding both of their arms so they couldn’t escape.

“The name’s Eret. Member of the Kuroba royal guard. We’ll put you in a hotel and you’ll have to stay there for a few days until we are sure that you two aren’t infected.”

Skeppy and Sam reluctantly followed, both sad for their own reasons.

SKEPPY, AWESAMDUDE and ERET exit.

SKEPPY enters.

“Bad! Hey! I’m baaack!” Skeppy called into the house. Shuffles and quick footsteps rang through the house as Bad ran to the living room.

BADBOYHALO enters.

Bad ran towards Skeppy, engulfing him in a hug. Skeppy returned it, and they stepped back.

“Skeppy! Welcome back from Kinoko! What did 5up say? Did he send a letter?” Bad asked intently.

“I went to find Sam to accompany me. When I found him, the health officials in his city thought we were infected with a plague or some bullshit.”

“Language!” Bad scolded, Skeppy giggled and continued.

“So, the health officials quarantined us, we weren’t allowed to leave. I couldn’t get to Kinoko because of it.”

Bad gasped.

“So who took my letter to 5up?”

Skeppy nervously laughed, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Uh, I couldn’t send it.”

Skeppy took the letter out of his pocket, handing it back to Bad.

“Couldn’t get a messenger either, they were scared of spreading the infection shit.”

Bad sighed.

“Skeppy! That letter was really important! It had important information, and it’s dangerous that it hasn’t been sent.”

Skeppy laughed again, more nervous. 

“It can’t be too bad, right? ...right?” Skeppy said quietly.

Bad sighed. 

“Go get the thing.”

Skeppy nodded, giving him another small apology and leaving.

SKEPPY exits.

“This is not good, not good at all. Fundy will wake up in three hours. Perhaps I’ll keep him down here until 5up gets here. Poor Fundy. He’ll wake up and 5up won’t be here. I’ll send him another letter, hopefully he hasn’t left,” Bad pondered to himself.

He had to act fast if he didn’t want 5up or Fundy to die.

Act 5, Scene 3

DREAM enters with his PAGE, PUNZ.

“Pass me your torch. Go and hide, make sure I can’t be seen. Listen to make sure nobody shows up. You know the bird signal, yes?”

Punz nodded, handing Dream the torch.

“Pass me the flowers.”

Punz bent down, picking up the messily arranged bouquet of flowers from the ground. Dream blew the torch out and nodded to Punz, who ran into the trees and bushes to hide. His white, black and gold attire was hard to cover, but the thick foliage would make do.

“I’ll take the risk, although being in this graveyard is scary,” Punz whispered to himself.

Dream walked over stealthily, setting down each foot as silently as he could. Once he reached the grave, he crouched down, scattering the flowers over the stone.

“How are you, my sleeping beauty? Hopefully you’re getting rest down there,” Dream said slyly. 

“I know what you did, love. I know you drank that potion. Why? I don’t know. But you should wake up soon, so have fun in your little prison while you wait.”

Dream perked up when he heard the whistle of a bird. He recognised it to be Punz, it was too loud to be an actual bird, and any smart person would know that the birds in Rozu don’t chirp at night.

“Someone approaches. I’ll have to hide for a while dear.”

Dream ran on the side, silently leaping into the shadows. His black and green cloak was perfect camouflage against the bushes. He listened quietly, ears ready for any sudden noise.

5UP and TUBBO enter.

Tubbo ran into the graveyard with 5up trailing behind him. They reached the grave and crouched down next to each other.

“Pass me the pick and crowbar,” Tubbo reached into his leather bag, pulling out the two things and passing them to 5up.

“Now take this letter, give it to my father early in the morning. Also pass me the torch,” Tubbo took the neatly folded letter and gave 5up the torch.

“One more thing.”

Tubbo looked at 5up curiously.

“Nobody hears of this. You’re going to leave and not interfere with my plan. He has a ring that I need. If you return to spy on me, I’ll do what I did to Tommy to you. Is that understood?” Tubbo nodded.

“Thanks, Tub. I’ll miss you.”

Tubbo smiled, hugging 5up.

“Goodbye, Cup. I’ll miss you too.”

5up ruffled Tubbo’s hair, smiling. Tubbo giggled, before waving and running into the bushes.

“I’m gonna hide nearby. I don’t want him to do anything stupid,” Tubbo said to himself, oblivious to Dream watching and listening in the trees.

Tubbo leapt into the bushes, but his eyes drooped closed and he yawned, chest steadily rising and falling.

5up turned back to the grave after watching Tubbo supposedly leave. He took the pick, looking down at the grave.

“I’ll join you soon, dear Fundy.”

Dream’s eyes narrowed. He watched as 5up drove the pick into the grave, and leapt gracefully out of the tree. He ran to where 5up was bent down and held his sword out at him.

“You’re really that desperate to get revenge on someone who’s already dead? You follow me now, don’t even think of running. You need to die.”

Dream didn’t want to reveal that Fundy was alive, in case 5up didn’t know.

“I do need to. That’s why I came here, I’m desperate. Just leave me. Forget about me. I’m here with weapons I will only use on myself. Just go,” 5up said, misery evident in his voice.

“I’m arresting you,” Dream said blankly.

“I’m staying here. You’ll have to kill me if you want me to leave,” 5up said coolly, drawing his sword.

“So be it.”

Dream ran at 5up, stepping to the side and immediately thrusting his sword towards 5up’s chest. 5up quickly jumped away, panic rising. He feigned a stab towards Dream, instead stepping backwards to catch his breath. Dream, however, saw through this and reached his sword under 5up’s arm, slashing upwards.

“I need to call the watch, they’re fighting,” Punz, who was watching the entire interaction, whispered to himself. He jumped up, running into the bushes.

PUNZ exits.

5up pulled his arm back, getting cut in the process. 

“Arm hurts, 5up? That’s too bad, isn’t it?” Dream said shrewdly. 

Dream took advantage of 5up’s weak arm, aiming his cuts and thrusts at his arm. 5up crouched, sweeping out his leg while Dream was in the middle of a slash. This caught him off guard, making Dream fall to the ground with a hard thump. 5up held his sword at Dream’s neck, close enough to draw blood.

“A little trip, Dreamie? That’s too bad,” 5up smiled. Dream smiled, staring straight into 5up’s brown eyes with his piercing green ones.

“You wouldn’t,” he said cunningly.

“Wanna bet on that?” 5up caid coldly, lifting his sword up and driving it into the other’s chest.

“Unfortunate, but fair,” Dream chuckled as the life drained from his eyes.

“Goodbye, Dream.”

Dream went limp, eyes dull and his body pale.

5up dropped his sword. Everything that he had done in the past week came crashing down. He’d lied. He’d fallen in love with a man. A man from the Dream SMP. He’d committed two murders, getting banished from Rozu. And now his love is dead. And it was his fault, because he left.

“...I’m so sorry Fundy,” 5up desperately dug the grave, prying it open to reveal the sleeping form of his love.

“You shouldn’t have died. This wasn’t meant to be. But you did, I don’t think I could live with it. I have to do this, my sweet rose. I can’t love without you. I could have saved you. I could have stopped this. You still don’t look dead, your lips are still pink, your skin is still sweet and warm.”

5up reached down into the grave, carefully lifting Fundy out and holding him in his arms. He reached his hand up and softly ran it down Fundy’s cheek. 

“Forgive me, my love. You are still so beautiful. I want to stay with you forever.”

5up leaned down, pressing Fundy’s lips to his. He savoured the faint warmth, pulling Fundy’s weak and limp body closer. Soon, he pulled away, tiny teardrops falling onto Fundy’s peaceful face. 

5up reached for the potion Karl gave him. Its once bright shimmering light had dimmed, now a dull red. He opened the glass bottle, pressing it to his mouth. He hesitated, but looked back at Fundy’s beautiful, soft face and downed the potion. 

Red tinted his vision, blurring his sight. His head ached, his body felt like it was being crushed. 5up held Fundy close to his heart, not noticing the other shift slightly closer to him.

“Love you, my rose.”

BADBOYHALO enters with a lantern, crowbar and shovel.

Bad stepped onto the overgrown path, spinning around after hearing someone trip over behind him. 

“Who’s there?” He said, scanning the overgrowth.

A small boy, around the age of Tommy stepped out from the bushes. His brunet hair was disheveled and his faded green shirt had tiny tears, probably from sitting in the bushes.

“I’m Tubbo! Friend of 5up,” He said quickly.

“Oh! Do you know why there’s a light by there? It looks like it’s in the SMP tomb.”

“5up took a lantern there. He said he had to do something, aaaaand also said that he would kill me if I went there.”

“Ah. How long has he been there?” 

“Half an hour, sir.”

“Well, I’ll go ahead. You stay back, I don’t want what you see to make you faint.”

Tubbo nodded, running back into the foliage. Bad smiled, turning back to the path. He carefully stepped closer to the tomb, noticing the smell of blood. He ran closer, seeing the red pooling at the rock. 

“What is this?” 

5up and Dream’s bodies lay still on the ground. Dream had a stab wound in his chest, and 5up had a glass bottle loosely in his hand. In his arms lay a sleeping Fundy, who was turning in his sleep. He would be waking up soon.

Fundy stirred, waking up to the dark sky above him and the smell of blood in the air. He sat up, rubbing his eyes. Bad took his hand, pulling him up. 

“I don’t have time to explain yet, someone’s coming. But follow me,” He rushed, pulling Fundy into the trees.

Fundy opened his mouth to talk, but decided to not ask any questions.

“You go, I’m staying here.”

Bad nodded, giving him an understanding stare. He gave Fundy a tight hug before running off.

BADBOYHALO exits.

“Why, 5up?”

He walked back to the body, bending down and placing his hand on the other’s cheek.

“You killed yourself because I was dead, didn’t you?” He whispered. 

Fundy noticed the bottle of poison in his hand. Only a few droplets were left, but he recognised the look of the poison.

“You poisoned yourself? Why? Did you really love me that much?” Fundy said, disbelief filling him. 

He paused.

“Well, I can’t live if you aren’t, my dear. You drank the entire bottle. Maybe there’s still some of the potion on your lips, that’s the way I want to die.”

Fundy leaned down, holding 5up’s head and chest up and kissing him. His lips were still warm, like the sunshine that once covered them on the balcony. Fundy had kissed him so many times, but each one seemed more magical than the last. He savoured it for as long as he could, but pulled away when he heard a crunch of some dry leaves in the distance.

WATCHMEN and PUNZ enter.

“Punz, which way was it?”

Fundy flinched, and made a split second decision. He picked up 5up’s dagger, holding it to his chest.

“I’ll be with you forever in death, 5up. For you, my rose.”

Fundy smiled, plunging the dagger into his chest. He froze, falling to the ground, just about on top of 5up. His hand landed on 5up’s cheek.

“Right here, sir,” Punz reported, reaching the entrance of the tomb.

“The ground’s bloody. Search the graveyard, arrest whoever you find.”

The watchmen and Punz scattered, searching the graveyard. Punz stumbled upon three bodies, the ground tainted with fresh, warm blood.

“Dream’s dead. Fundy’s bleeding out. One of you, tell Prince George. Go to the Cogchamps and the Dream SMP guys,” Punz barked orders at them, making some of the watchmen exit, leaving in different directions.

A WATCHMAN re-enters with TUBBO.

“This is one of 5up’s friends. We found him shivering in the bushes.”

Tubbo looked up at Punz and laughed nervously.

“Keep him until George gets here.”

ANOTHER WATCHMAN re-enters with BADBOYHALO.

“This is the guy that was meant to marry Fundy and Dream. He’s trembling and crying. He had a pick and shovel which we took.”

Punz nodded, pointing to Tubbo. The watchmen shoved him towards Tubbo, and he stood there, shaking. Tubbo grabbed his arm, clinging to the other man.

PRINCE GEORGE enters with ATTENDANTS.

“Why must crimes happen so early in the morning?” George groaned, entering the scene tiredly.

WILBUR and LADY SALLY enter.

“What’s happening? Why is there so much commotion?” Wilbur exclaimed.

“There’s people crying ‘5up’ and ‘Fundy’ and some crying ‘Dream.’ What’s happening?” Sally said softly.

“Count Dream’s dead. So is 5up. And Fundy. Fundy was dead for a while, but now it appears like he hasn’t been dead for long,” Punz recounted. 

“How did this happen?” George asked.

“Here’s Badboyhalo. He had tools to open the tombs with.”

Wilbur ran over to Fundy’s body, bending down, careful not to stain his clothes with the fresh blood.

“The knife is in his chest instead of that Cogchamp’s sheath. How did this happen?” He asked desperately.

“How was this possible?” Sally whispered.

TOAST enters.

“Toast, sir. You’re awake early to see your son late,” George said nonchalantly.

“What more pain should I endure? My wife died last night, from sadness over 5up’s exile,” He said sadly.

“Well, I’m sorry for what you have to see.”

George stepped away from the body, allowing Toast to take a look. He gasped.

“Save whatever you have to say for later. We’ll clear everything up later. Be patient, we need to figure out what happened first.”

Bad stepped forwards putting his hands up.

“I have the most suspicion, but I was able to do the least. Please punish me, I was here during the murder,” He said meekly.

“Go on then,” George said, curious.

“I’ll keep it as brief as I can. 5up married Fundy. They fell in love on the day of Wilbur’s party and I married them.”

Toast and Wilbur gasped, both surprised for different reasons.. 

“Their wedding was on the day Tommy died. His death made 5up get banished, and Fundy was sad because of 5up’s banishment, not Tommy’s death. Because you tried to cure his sadness by arranging the marriage with Dream, he came to me to try and get him out of the marriage. He threatened to kill himself. So I gave him a sleeping potion to make him appear dead.”

Sally nudged Wilbur, who shared an incomprehensible look.

“I wrote to 5up and told him to take Fundy from the grave when he woke up. But the man who carried the letter, Skeppy, was held up. So I came here myself, hoping I could get Fundy and intercept 5up when I could come in contact with him. But by the time I got here, Fundy was waking up and Dream and 5up were already dead. I tried to bring Fundy away, but a noise scared us. He wanted to stay with 5up, and when I left, I’m assuming he killed himself. That’s all I know. The nurse knows about the marriage too.”

Wilbur and Sally whispered among themselves while Toast stood in surprised silence.

“If anyone deserves punishment, it’s me,” He said sadly.

“You’re a good man. Bring Tubbo.”

Tubbo stepped forward, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Uh, I told 5up about Fundy’s death. He rode here from Kinoko. Earlier he asked me to give this letter to his father.”

Tubbo took out the carefully sealed letter.

“When he went into the tomb, he told me he would kill me if I followed him.”

Tubbo handed the letter to George, who took it and read the envelope.

“Where’s Dream’s page? The one who called the watch?” Punz stepped forward.

“Dream came to me with flowers to put on Fundy’s grave. He asked me to keep watch and stay far away, so I did. Someone came to open the tomb, which I’m assuming was 5up, so Dream attacked him. I went to call the watch,” Punz said confidently.

George nodded, opening the envelope and skimming over the letter.

“Well, this confirms Bad’s account. It describes their love and the news of Fundy’s death. He bought poison from a Karl Jacobs in Kinoko, and intended to use it in the tomb to die and lie with Fundy.”

George glared at Wilbur and Toast, who were awkwardly standing next to him.

“Don’t you see what your stupid feud’s done? Your own sons are dead because of your hate. I’ve lost many members of my family as well, we’ve all been punished.”

Wilbur sighed, turning to Toast. He held out his hand, looking away.

“I guess Fundy would have wanted us to stop fighting. I ask for nothing more.”

Toast took his hand, laughing.

“Well I can give more. I’ll make a gold statue of Fundy, to pay my respects. As long as this city is called Rozu, Fundy will be remembered,” He said.

“Well, I’ll match you. I’ll make a gold statue of 5up to be next to Fundy. They were sacrifices for our rivalry, and they will be respected and remembered.”

George nodded, satisfied with their peace agreements. He crossed his arms.

“We settle peace this morning. The dark sky will soon become a bright day. Some will be pardoned, some punished.”

George beckoned them away. Wilbur and Toast chatted about the gold statues they were going to create. He sighed. It might take a while to achieve full peace, but this was a good start.

They exit.

-fin-


End file.
